Hi everybody! My schedule has been really unforgiving, so I may or may not end up writing something and making changes to the post later in the week.
Regardless, I hope you all have a good week!
Join our public Matrix server!
https://matrix.to//#/#tracha-space:transfem.dev
https://rentry.co/tracha#tracha-rooms
As a reminder, please do not discuss current struggle sessions in the mega. We want this to be a little oasis for all of us and the best way to do that is not to feed into existing conflict on the site.
Also, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It’s for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.
Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.
hi, does anyone wanna make the mega in the upcoming weeks? if so, reply to this post and i’ll add you to the list!
the list as it stands:
cummynism2cumharder (2/10 - 2/16) Moss (2/17 - 2/23) EstraDoll (2/24 - 3/2) Yukiko (3/3 - 3/9) GayTuckerCarlson* (3/10 - 3/16) oscardejarjayes* (3/17 - 3/23) Eco* (3/24 - 3/30) * after name denotes someone who has posted before and will be skipped by first-time posters
Sign me back up. I should be fine to do it now.
sounds good, i’ll put you on
I’d like to do the trans mega at some point, but does it have to be about gender or something related? If it does I’ll happily do one about Public Universal Friend but if not I want to force everyone to read about Asa Mitaka, my favourite character in fiction
it doesn’t have to be about gender stuff at all, it’s basically just an excuse to talk about something you care about. i can put you on for the week of the 17th if you’d like
Okey dokey sounds good!
Hi, I’d be interested in making a mega thread but I’ve never done one before.
no problem! basically i send you the title and the stuff to add at the bottom and you can just write whatever you want above it. you can do next week’s if you want, alternatively you can have a week to plan stuff out, it’s whatever you wanna do
I can do this upcoming week! I just make a normal post in https://hexbear.net/c/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns?
yes! i’ll add you to the list and just send you the stuff in a message now
someone said they liked my outfit the other day and i’ve been riding that high ever since. it wasn’t even one of my favs but thank you
Somebody please be nice to me or something
mental health shitpost for the blurst day of my life
Smoking on that “had to jumpstart two cars today and blew your credit card on shit at the anime convention and fell in love with a trans girl that helped you through a panic attack and gave you a figure from her booth on the house and then gave you the sweetest compliment then you tried to gift her your cute thrifted raincoat and she tried it on and said she loved how it looks but the sleeves were too short and the material gave her sensory issues and we both laughed when that was my complaint about it too and thought she might not have that issue but we’re both spectrumy and then she gave me a card with her socials but you thought it sounded like she meant it in a “hey let’s be friends” way instead of a crush way and now you’re ripping bowls in the backyard even though it’s freezing crying to Ladies And Gentlemen We Are Floating In Space on repeat” pack
Are there any supplements or something I should take to put muscle mass back on? Started transitioning over summer, got depressed after the U.S. election. And haven’t been working out.
Have lost 15 lbs of muscle mass, and I didn’t have a lot to begin with.
I’m annoyed. Right after top surgery, my breasts were FINALLY even. Left was always much bigger than right and having them be the same was glorious! Until now. Cause apparently I went through another growth spurt in my breasts, but it was only leftie so they’re uneven again >:(
my muscles don’t hurt nearly as much after woking out yesterday
appearance, health
I use to be kinda hot. Trim, good amount of muscle, I put a lot of work into my appearance and was going to the gym somewhat regularly to weightlift
Time to get back into it
anxietyposting about hornyposting
I hornyposted to a personals site looking for someone to flog and fuck me, and my introverted anxiety ridden self is v anxious from it. But its good for me - my homework is to be more forward with people. I just wish i didnt get all panicked from it 🙃
2·20 hours agodeleted by creator
depression, negativity, etc
I was thinking earlier about other paths my life could have gone down. And I don’t see how things could have ended up differently, with being trans. Being trans has given me horrible, horrible depression. I remember “the spark” fading when puberty hit, and my depression getting really bad 15/16~ when more effects were more noticeable. It has not gotten better. I don’t think it will get better. Being trans, the dysphoria, the social side, it has ruined me.
There have been so many things I’ve wanted to do, engage with, etc. That I haven’t. Because I’ve been depressed. And I believe being trans is the center of all of it. Its what makes the most sense.
I don’t see how its escapable. I am broken. My body is a prison. I feel alienated. I am not like them. I will not be understood. I am hated for being defective. I’m never going to be comfortable around people. Around myself. Its just suffering, literally forever, until I put a stop to it.
I don’t want to be depressed for the rest of my life. I’ve met people who were- and it seems horrible. I don’t want to be a self hating, alcoholic 40 year old one day. I don’t want to be empty, and bitter, and hateful the rest of my life. I want to feel normal again.
It has all been ruined. I can’t escape depression. The cause- the issue- is me. I am just broken. There’s not a fix. I’m going to keep coping, at least for a bit, with distractions, and talking with people, and probably some less healthy things too. But I don’t want to cope forever. I don’t want to be depressed forever. If life is just depression, maybe its not worth it. I still- can’t believe this has happened to me. What a horrible, cruel fate. I don’t deserve this.
I just want to feel normal again. Be normal. Act normally, I want to live my life normally, I want the depression to stop. I want the dysphoria to stop. I want to enjoy life again. Its just… all tied back to being trans. And I feel like hardly anyone understands. Not like being understood would change anything. There’s no changing. Cutting it off here because I’ll just loop on this, over and over, like I have been for hours. I hope I got the gist across.
self harm fantasy, vent, kinda extreme so maybe just ignore.
I want to slice my arms open. Feel the blood, the rush… god if scars weren’t an issue I’d have done it there so many times. I want it so bad. I have never been able to do the self harm I want to do- before I die I will. One of the last things I do on this earth will be slicing my left forearm open. I have wanted to for years and years at this point.
I look like if a girl took testosterone (I did for the first 30 years)
My nipples got fuckin HUGE. Didn’t realize how big, saw some pre hrt pics. It kinda snuck on to me
Obviously modding it until it breaks is an option for Skyrim. But one way I like to play is to do the normal game but as soon as I butt up against a problem or find something lacking fix it with mods.
Right now with my Vampire Lesbian, the Bloodchill Manor was feeling a bit lonely. I had turned Carine a beggar into a vampire for a previous quest. I used the mod that lets you turn beggars into servants. So now I have a named vampire I created keeping my place tidy, alongside my wife Uthgerd and a human thrall in the cell. I’m going to get the bone wolf as a pet too, because my character is also a powerful necromancer. Maybe use a mod to adopt that Aretino kid to raise as an assassin if I ever do the Dark Brotherhood.
I think my brain is just hard wired to not understand sports. I’ve had the game of football explained to me no less than 4 times in my life and I still don’t really get it 😭
crying pissing shitting ripping my hair out I have lost the ability to draw and it’s driving me crazy, please just let this art block be over
