Sliced tomatoes, raw chikory, hard boiled egg with home made mayo.

Sandwiches with potato chips between them

Toast, mayo, fried egg, salt. Then a liberal amount of Dave’s ghost pepper sauce on top, like a teaspoon.

I’m the only person I know of who will eat this specific hot sauce. Other hot sauce lovers will not touch it, because it tastes like capsaicin extract and poison. But I’m weirdly addicted to it. I own better tasting sauces but they don’t scratch the itch the right way.

Sourdough with chunky peanut butter, ground mustard, and aioli.

fermented shrimp paste, pickled bird eyes chili, soy sauce, fresh mangoes and plain white rice. topped with a heaping pinch of msg.

Germany has brands of bottled curry sauce that are great on white rice.

I’ve never seen them in the US… but mayonnaise and curry powder is close enough.

Ranch noodles, though, I’ve served to guests all the time. It is exactly what it sounds like. You squirt ranch dressing all over fresh elbow / corkscrew pasta, and ideally cool overnight. It’s two-ingredient pasta salad. Ranch is buttermilk, garlic, dill, and a bunch of other spices. Great as a side. Add pepper.

I haven’t had this in a while but one if my lazy bachelor meals was baked potatoes with kim chee and sour cream.

Mix 2 different instant noodle products, Carbonara Buldak and Neoguri and create a sodium overload saucy cheesy ramen. We only have it max twice a month though because it’s so high in sodium.

When I’m home alone, I’ll sometimes revert to my “first apartment” mood and cook spaghetti with Campbell tomato soup in it, added with sautéed onions, mushrooms, hotdog sausages, and add cheese in it.

Is probably better than the crappiest thing I could come up with, but I wouldn’t serve that too an adult. But maybe to children.

Cinnamon raisin bagels with lox and cream cheese

Two pieces of white bread, mayo, thick slices of tomato and a bunch of black pepper… Not sure how terrible it is, but I don’t generally serve it to others because it’s very messy.

Pasta with ketchup instead of tomato sauce

Rice with ketchup

Ketchup with ketchup

I love ketchup

Raw chickpeas. The small, black kind. I soak them overnight in cold water, and have them for breakfast along with a shot of espresso.

I got it from my dad. He used to have them with tea.

I keep a bouquet of dry pasta on my desk that I absentmindedly munch on while I work.

Sometimes I’ll eat a whole head of cabbage over a day peeling it leaf by leaf.

Hobo salad: Canned kidney beans, canned sweetcorn, canned tuna, salad dressing. If I’m feeling fancy/not lazy I’ll add some chopped shallots or scallions.