Swearwords increasingly used for emphasis and to build social bonds, rather than to insult, say academics

  • BarqsHasBite
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    11 months ago

    I never understood people that freak out at swearing. I can understand it’s not the most polite, but some people really freak out if you swear.

    • @Squizzy@lemmy.world
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      8011 months ago

      As someone who curses quite a bit, going to America was an eye opener. People who weren’t even in the conversation were taking offense. I didn’t realise it was so taboo there. Cunt is never said and it’s like a 20 a day word for me.

      • @protist@mander.xyz
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        7511 months ago

        Imo here in the US, cunt has something of a sexist connotation, so respectable blasphemers tend to avoid it unless it’s really called for.

        • @thesmokingman@programming.dev
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          2411 months ago

          In my personal swearing, I try to limit it to things that apply to everyone. Fornication, defecation, and damnation are things everyone can do (but might choose not to). Gendered or targeted swears have the possibility of perpetuating toxic traits, so I personally stay away from them. Fuck, shit, damn, all good. Other things get slippery so I try to avoid them myself. Granted, even that is a blurry line as I’ve highlighted I’m fine denigrating walnuts and trumpets elsewhere in this thread. I also don’t force that somewhat provincial view on others because it’s a personal standard. I might talk about why I try to avoid gendered swears, but that’s on me not on you.

          • Herbal Gamer
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            411 months ago

            I’d argue it’s perfectly possible to be a cunt without having one.

          • @0ops@lemm.ee
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            111 months ago

            Yeah, context can matter too though. I might say “son of a bitch” when I miss an exit or something, but I wince when I hear a woman called a bitch. In that context it’s essentially a slur

        • @captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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          211 months ago

          It’s also sometimes used as an extremely crass description of genitals. People calling it a cunt either tend to be a bit of a pig or someone who’s got one and swears like a sailor

          • @cammoblammo@lemmy.world
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            311 months ago

            Yet it wasn’t always that way. Once upon a time that was the normal, everyday ‘correct’ word for that part of the body. It was only a few hundred years ago we decided that Greek and Latin words were the only proper way to discuss anatomy.

      • @LemmyIsFantastic@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Cunt is always going to rile women and some men more. It’s a completely different context here. Most women really really don’t like it.

        A fuck or shit as long as it’s not in a children’s park or anything in most places isn’t going to be that big a deal.

      • M. D. Pan0wski
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        1211 months ago

        I’ve always perceived Americans as very curse word friendly people. Not like Australians of course, but still very accepting of it.

      • @captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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        711 months ago

        As an American yeah that’s used to happen. But I’ve not had it happen in years. Cunt though, yeah it’s considered either an extremely misogynistic insult or an extremely graphic term for body parts we don’t talk about much.

        • @0ops@lemm.ee
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          211 months ago

          I’m not that old but even in the last 15 years or so I’ve noticed that the fuck-word has become a lot less taboo. Even people I know who don’t swear very much I’ve heard use it, granted very sparingly, but they wouldn’t have used it at all a fewyears ago. Kids are picking up swearwords casually earlier than my peers did.

          My hypothesis, I think I big part of the change is YouTube personalities. A ton of the biggest YouTubers, especially the gamers, have sailor mouths. Gen z and later grew up with “let’s fuckin go” and shit like that, and I think that that casualness is bleeding into older generations too.

        • @greedytacothief@lemmy.world
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          111 months ago

          I work a trade in the US, and if something is a little off, it’s a cunt hair off. But that’s the most common place I hear it.

          • @captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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            211 months ago

            That’s ridiculous. My cunt has the thickest hairs on my body. If it’s a little off it should be a belly hair off. Fuckers are just like “ha you’re still a mammal so one of us will slightly darken from time to time”

      • @roguestew@lemmy.world
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        511 months ago

        I’m curious what state you were in. It varies quite a bit regionally. I curse frequently and have never had anyone in public get offended where I live.

      • @lobut@lemmy.ca
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        411 months ago

        I remember people from the US coming to our little office and the amount of swearing we did shocked them. It was almost funny to watch them turn around in disbelief.

      • @Socsa@sh.itjust.works
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        211 months ago

        I’m in the US and swear quite a lot. Even at work and on slack and shit. I don’t think I’ve ever been fussed at for it.

      • @HelluvaKick@lemmy.world
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        211 months ago

        At least the “serving cunt” meme has supercharged America’s acceptance towards the word. Live in the south and have heard more people say it in public in the past year than ever before.

        • Possibly linux
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          11 months ago

          Honestly you have a right to complain to anyone who is swearing. That’s not a nice thing to say and serves no value.

          • @HipHoboHarold@lemmy.world
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            1111 months ago

            Moat words don’t serve value. We could get rid of a decent sized portion of our dictionary of we wanted to. But we keep them because they still serve a purpose.

            If I tell you I threw the red ball, you didn’t need to know it was red. But you can get a little bit more of an image of the story I am telling you by throwing it in there.

            “But curse words are different!”

            Why? I ask this all the time, and I have never had anyone give me a good answer as to why fuck is bad. I can say fudge to replace it, and suddenly its. Fine. I’m saying the same thing with the same attitude and the same intent, but I just switched it out for something that sounds different so that we all know what I’m saying without actually saying it. So why is fuck a bad word?

            • @candybrie@lemmy.world
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              311 months ago

              I think it’s because that’s the purpose of swear words. To be the bad words. It’s how language develops. And there are benefits to having some bad words. It allows you to choose your level of formality, to signal familiarity or emotional state. They even apparently live somewhere else in your brain and swearing actually reduces pain to some degree.

              • @HipHoboHarold@lemmy.world
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                411 months ago

                Which for me then raises the question of: Do we have evidence these were created to be BAD? I’m not necessarily talking about FORMAL. While I’m not a very formal person, I can at least understand the reason there is a more formal way of talking. But formal would basically just be a more proper way of using the language without any form of slang. Using slang would still be seen on another level from swear words.

                So what makes the word fuck bad? Even when not in a formal environment some people will get upset over swear words, but not only people speaking in a casual manner. Why? What sets apart the word fuck from other words?

                • @captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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                  211 months ago

                  You can triangulate the issues if you look at a variety of languages. They’re linguistic taboos. In English and German they tend to be sexual or involve private biology in some way. In French they’re religious words that should be held in high regards being used in profaning ways. In Scandinavia it’s diseases one would rather not have. These are words that we set aside for some reason to not use in casual ways at one point and then we use it as an easy taboo to break

            • @jjjalljs@ttrpg.network
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              211 months ago

              At an old job I said something in the work chat like “for fuck’s sake, it returns 200 OK when there’s an error!”

              One of the managers responded “language, please.”

              So me, an asshole, started using “fudge” instead of “fuck” everywhere. “That endpoint is fudged up and we should change it”.

              They “let me go” a couple months later, but now I make twice as much money doing more interesting work, so that worked out. They can go fudge themselves.

              To actually answer, I imagine for some people it calls up imagery of fucking, and that makes them uncomfortable. But that seems like a them problem. I’m not very sympathetic on that explanation.

          • @captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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            911 months ago

            That wasn’t very nice or productive of a thing for you to say. The linguistic benefits of profanity are well established and it seems to be a cultural issue, not a kindness issue. Tone tends to play more of a signifier in kindness of profanity than word choice, and their use as a genuine insult appears to be declining.

          • @Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world
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            711 months ago

            You certainly have the right to complain; but the one you’re whining to also has the right to tell you to fuck off.

            You’re free to adhere to whatever rules you’d like, but imposing your preferences on others is going to be met with resistance, so if you hear some stranger say something you find offensive, maybe just mind your own business?

      • The Barto
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        111 months ago

        If I haven’t called someone or something a cunt during my day, then there’s something seriously wrong with me and I need to go to the hospital immediately.

      • @gamermanh@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        011 months ago

        As a Californian who grew up playing long nights with my Aussie friends (AUS connects to CA for their Internet so we get them a lot at night):

        I’m one of the Americans fighting for the use of “cunt” more!

        People are shocked at first when I use it but I’m usually onto the next thing so fast, suddenly say it in an Australian accent, and am very clearly not being negative when I say it most times (big smiles) they usually pick up that it’s not mean.

        They do ask where the fuck I learned to use it though and it took my wife literal years to adjust

      • Possibly linux
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        -3511 months ago

        Why on Earth would you be using such language in a public place? I can’t imagine why people were freaking out.

    • @thesmokingman@programming.dev
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      5311 months ago

      I’ve found that many people can’t differentiate “swearing around” vs “swearing at.” If I am swearing, it is to add filler words to my sentences that serve many purposes. I am not (rather, very rarely) attempting to insult or denigrate someone else. I do not understand why someone takes offense at “I really struggled to hit my fucking steps today” or “Shit I dropped the fucking ball.” I do understand why someone takes offense at “you ignorant fucking walnut” or “fuck you you fuck trumpet.” Conflating the two situations is so fucking dumb.

    • @ornery_chemist@mander.xyz
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      411 months ago

      I’ve thought about this (and taboo and norms in general) for a bit, so I’ll take an unresearched guess that can be summarized as “swears are bad because people agree they are”. Words have an associated context; which ones you use give some indication about the kind of person you are. In the case of swears, the context is that most people think that it is wrong to say them (though exactly how wrong varies), and (this is important) that most people think that everyone knows how wrong it is to say them. If you say a swear, you are (in others’ eyes) demonstrating that you are the kind of person willing to knowingly violate these norms. The implication continues, then, that you are uncaring about what they might think or believe, what everyone in the community thinks or believes, and are willing to demonstrate that to their faces. Obviously, that may not match how you intended the word, but I think that this perceived hostility lies at the core of the reactions of those who freak out.

      Either that or trauma from their parents or teachers freaking out it, or fear of divine punishment or something similar.

      • BarqsHasBite
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        311 months ago

        Interesting thought. It’s kind of like the out group of, clutches pearls, atheists.

      • @protist@mander.xyz
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        3611 months ago

        Profanity has existed for thousands of years in almost all languages and cultures for a reason, it absolutely serves a purpose.

  • @paddirn@lemmy.world
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    5011 months ago

    I still think swearing should be used sparingly! Otherwise its effect gets diluted! It!d be like replacing every bit of punctuation with an exclamation point! Eventually it just loses its original meaning! and people stop even registering it! Treat swearing as sacred! use it to accentuate a point! and people will appreciate its importance when you do use it!

    • @Socsa@sh.itjust.works
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      11 months ago

      It should be diluted. Language should not have that power over our emotions. Swearing becoming an extension of a purely descriptive lexicon is a good thing IMO.

      Poetic language and rich prose should be the standard for emotional conveyance. That makes it special and rare. Allowing simple crass or boorish language to hold emotional power is what cheapens the concept of language having power.

      • @azertyfun@sh.itjust.works
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        411 months ago

        You can still pack a punch with swearing, you just gotta get creative about it.

        Swearing is to language what capsaicin is to food. It’s not required, in some circumstances it makes things worse, but in many other it would be a real shame to deprive oneself of it, especially for a reason as stupid as “but I’m going to increase my tolerance”. So fucking what? It’s not heroin, shit’s not going to put you into cardiac arrest if you take too much.

    • @LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Yes I use profanity sparingly! And when I use it, I really mean it!!!

      (Exclamation points added for emphasis and dilution of the entire point I’m trying to make!!!)

    • @0ops@lemm.ee
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      111 months ago

      Eh, they’re just words. I agree that using them too much “dilutes” them, but is that really anything to do with them being swearwords? Or because they’re the same word I used 20 times in a two minute conversation? Literally, when I literally use the same word in literally every other sentence, you’ll literally start to doubt that I even know what the word “literally” literally means.

      Personally, I think that most swearwords are pretty versatile. Especially fuck. Fuck can be serious. Fuck can be fun. Fuck can be casual or intense. Fuck isn’t a monolith, it’s all in the context, tone, and delivery.

    • @smeg@feddit.uk
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      011 months ago

      Absolutely, keep your powder dry until you need it. Swears are sentence enhancers, they carry weight, but if you throw them around in every sentence then they lose that weight and have no real meaning anymore. But if you hold off so people aren’t expecting it and then throw in a choice word then it carries a lot more weight. That’s the fucking point!

  • @CptInsane0@lemmy.world
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    3911 months ago

    It comes up a lot more in professional settings than it used to. I would actually give this one to GenX and appreciate it when used correctly.

    • @cmbabul@lemmy.world
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      4111 months ago

      Gen X broke down the gate, millennials buried the gate, and Gen Z built a monument to swearing on top of where the gate once stood

        • @cmbabul@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          But that’s not a swear or curse word. The swear words are: shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, tits, damn, sonofabitch, goddamn, ass, asshole, bastard and other plays on those words.

          And I’m pretty sure the unalive thing came from TikTok pulling and censoring videos with the word kill in them.

    • Ech
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      11 months ago

      I’d say it’s still not great to use in most professional settings, with the caveat that every environment is different. I’m not gonna be clutching pearls if I do run into someone that’s more liberal with their curses, but I’m not going to be spouting off myself.

      • @TheTetrapod@lemmy.world
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        1411 months ago

        Why have you chosen this hill to die on? Swearing harms no one, and makes talking more fun. I honestly take an aversion to swearing as a sign of immaturity.

        • Possibly linux
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          -3011 months ago

          The fact that you resort to swearing is immature. I ask the people I’m around to not swear and the people that know me know my thoughts on swearing.

          • @0ops@lemm.ee
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            211 months ago

            Resort? That’s a weird way to put it. I don’t even think about swearing. Sometimes “fuck” is just the perfect word for the job. Hell, pretty often it is, because the word “fuck” is so versatile. Nothing beats the literal poetry of a well placed word, and face it man sometimes that word is “fuck”. Fuck fuck fuck

      • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥
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        1211 months ago

        A “universal basic income” shouldn’t be a thing. It encourages laziness and is more government spending which can worsen inflation.

        Get fucked.

        • @theneverfox@pawb.social
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          211 months ago

          By punching it. If you hit a word right when it’s coming out of someone’s mouth, you can hurt the word itself

        • Possibly linux
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          -2011 months ago

          I ask the people around me to not use such harsh language. Most people are more than happy to comply

          • @protist@mander.xyz
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            2011 months ago

            A “universal basic income” shouldn’t be a thing. It encourages laziness

            This is harsh language that offends me. Stop using it

    • K0W4L5K1
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      411 months ago

      sir Nacktmull you motherfucker you can have fucking great manners and swear like a sailor. Thank you very much ya cunt

  • @frunch@lemmy.world
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    3711 months ago

    I love the image they attached to the article. Is that woman the chancellor of swearing or something?

  • @merc@sh.itjust.works
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    1411 months ago

    Isn’t it more that the words that are acceptable are changing?

    In the ancient past, it was “taking the lord’s name in vain” that was so extreme. Now, most people don’t care about that. You can still see that difference in the “curse words” used in Quebec vs. France. In Quebec the naughty words are all Catholicism-related: esti, calise, tabarnak, etc. In France they’re more similar to the common English ones: merde (shit), putain (whore), etc.

    The religious swear words had lost their bite in most English cultures ages ago, people still say things like “christ” or “oh my god”, but those mild expressions would have been jaw-droppingly awful a century earlier. For a while damn was one of the most awful words, which is why you had things like “gosh darn”.

    Now, it’s words that were truly offensive maybe 40 years ago that are becoming common: fuck, shit, cunt, etc.

    But, at the same time, words that were common in the past are becoming truly offensive now, for example “the n word”, faggot, retard, tranny, etc.

    • @sushibowl@feddit.nl
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      411 months ago

      The n word is much, much worse than the other truly offensive words on your list. You can tell by how it’s the only one you can’t actually write out, even in a discussion on swear words.

      • @merc@sh.itjust.works
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        311 months ago

        Yep, right now it has taken the #1 spot, whereas a few decades ago it was just a normal word that people used in conversation.

      • @567PrimeMover@lemmy.world
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        211 months ago

        People will use “removed” as a placeholder for whatever slur would have their post removed on a given platform.

        • @whatwhatwutyut@midwest.social
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          311 months ago

          I think it’s that “removed” is what some Lemmy clients will show unless you change your settings to not filter swear words. I don’t think anyone is actually typing removed in their comments

  • @tipicaldik@lemmy.world
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    1211 months ago

    My youngest daughter used to never cuss. Just a total sweetheart like that. The worst thing I think I heard her say was “she act’s like such a B-word!” Then she started scoring races at a local dirt track, and after putting up with all the BS from the drivers (and especially their wives) she’s now out there tossing around fucks and shits and bitches and assholes and various physical threats like they’re confetti…

    • @LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world
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      311 months ago

      Yes, the hard knocks of life will toughen up even the sweetest little cutie pies. And hey how did a sweetie pie get involved with dirt track racing in the first place? Surely that environment would have an influence on creating a potty mouth.

      • @tipicaldik@lemmy.world
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        111 months ago

        She married her HS sweetheart who’s been driving since he was 14. His parents took over ownership of one of our area’s tracks several years ago (there are 4 within a fifty mile radius of us) and my daughter’s been scoring the races for them ever since. I did it with her for a couple of seasons back when she first started. Fun stuff…

    • @feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world
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      311 months ago

      Yeah, they’re shit - pissbaby, chucklefuck, all that other saccharine bullshit. Just call a cunt a cunt and be done with it. I know it’s offensive to women’s wonderful genitals but it’s so percussive.

      • @Rodeo@lemmy.ca
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        -111 months ago

        As if the women who complain about the word cunt have never used dick or dickhead as an insult.

    • Queen HawlSera
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      211 months ago

      Well it’ll be awhile before the six letter f-word or the r word are allowed again

  • @Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca
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    11 months ago

    It was honestly a small culture shock for me when I moved from the US to Canada. Everyone I knew in the States swore rampantly amongst themselves, but in public people were often reserved and proper, and swearing in the presence of a stranger or elderly person would result in some pearl clutching - especially on a retail level.

    Up here nobody gives a fuck. It’s just in the vocabulary. I’ve gotten so used to it that I dropped a bunch of things at work recently and muttered “FFFUUCK ME!” in front of an elderly woman who I didn’t realize was standing there. I apologized for my language and she was completely unfazed. Thought it was funny. Just went about helping me gather my things. Probably went up to buy her stuff afterward and said something along the lines of “Hope we get a fuckin’ chinook.”.

    • @AA5B@lemmy.world
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      -111 months ago

      That’s one of my arguments against excessive swearing: it loses its power. What do you do when something significant happens and you need the power of words that make an impact?

      Y’all are just like hyperbolic headlines from cheap media outlets trying to get attention. You tricked me into reacting, but I vow to ignore you next time.

      And of course there’s the literacy argument. You’re just interjecting words that have lost their meaning, and using the same few words for everything. Do you really not have more of a vocabulary or imagination? Or why do you add necessary words to everything when fewer words have the same meaning?

      • @themelm@sh.itjust.works
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        411 months ago

        If you’re so worried about literacy then you shouldn’t need to rely on the crutch of swearing to make sure something has impact. Maybe you can tell when I’m serious because I stop swearing as I enjoy doing casually and instead rely on formal and precise language.

        Why do we have thesauruses at all? Why add any unnecessary flourishes to language? Would it be the same message if someone spoke without swearing at all? Why should people censor themselves just so you can have people know you for suresies meant it when you stubbed your toe this time?

        Why do individual words need power? Surely the sentiment and meaning of them is what gives them power. For instance this post of yours is more offensive to my cuss-loving ass than any amount of calling me a dumb motherfucker would be. Take your faux-erudition and carefully place it somewhere dark please.

        • @AA5B@lemmy.world
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          111 months ago

          I had similar discussions with my kids when they learned to swear. The first swore frequently and indiscriminately. It was just annoying and he sounded like an idiot. But the younger kid knew just when to drop that nice juicy swear word so appropriately that you just couldn’t object. He knows how to use other words, so doesn’t sound dumb, and he makes the most out of when he does swear.

          • @themelm@sh.itjust.works
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            111 months ago

            OK, but people who go out of their way to not swear when they want to are honestly instantly distrusted by me until I know them better. You see swearing as childish and I see it as a normal thing people do when they’re comfortable.

            You still say you need to keep swearing in reserve for effect but a constantly shouty swearing guy going real quiet and formal with language is terrifying and you definitely know shit has gotten real.