Is it weird that sometimes I’ll do something like that? Like I’ll think I’m playfully teasing someone but immediately after think “actually that was a kinda shitty thing to say.”
Is it a sign that I’ve got something wrong with me or is it just saying what I think I should say but don’t actually believe? Maybe I’m secretly an asshole? I dunno man.
Nah it means you’re not an asshole.
If you, instead, decided that since you didn’t mean to be shitty you did nothing wrong… that’s what an asshole does.
People make mistakes
Don’t dismiss that feeling. Sounds like self awareness. Continue following that thread and you’ll eventually figure out how to be better.
I way overthink every time this happens. Like I remember me being kind of a dick to my grandma 30 years ago and it genuinely haunts me and she was just like “???
” when I mentioned it to her like she didn’t remember at all lol.I stg that I have an asshole side of my brain and if I’m not constantly conscious and reasoning my way through every conversation it’ll pop out and talk about how I love the idea of killing and eating babies and punching pregnant women in the stomach
I think this all the time.
Nah, I’ve said stuff even as my internal thoughts were saying ‘this is cruel/rude, you shouldn’t say this’, though I usually have moments like this in anger
Yeah but have you ever said something that was like “This is the opposite of what I believe”?
Yes, cause I just wanted to argue (but I do try to avoid doing that)
I think I might be a little too high for this conversation, but I don’t think you’re an asshole if you got people you can joke around with like that
This isn’t high school, you’re not forced to spend time with jerks
So if there are any hexbearinos finishing high school my advice does not apply
This isn’t high school, you’re not forced to spend time with jerks
good advice in a prescriptive sense but you absolutely cannot reason backwards that anyone who hasn’t left must therefore be comfortable with the situation.
if people could be expected to always leave when they’re unhappy then there would be no need for this advice!
Really love it when the executive function decides to show up and see what’s going on after I’ve stuffed my foot in my mouth.
Hey lots of people say mean shit and don’t catch themselves or try to rectify.
You’re being mindful with the intention of being less of a jerk. You’ll get there!
Well if you learn social behaviour by mimicking others and others have a history of being mean then I get how that happens.
I-
… Urgh.
I know someone who does that a lot and they recently mentioned that they think it might be connected to negative self-talk, in their case. Being in the habit of communicating a certain way makes you more likely to communicate that way, turns out.
Is it because you say things as if it’s a bit? I do this, but sometimes right after realize that not only was it mean, but like I only said because I thought it was a funny joke maybe.
I think the thing to do here is to apologize. Even if it’s later, and even if they didn’t notice it was mean. An apology even if (especially if) belated comes across as you being really thoughtful.
You might just have been hungry. Never hurts to apologize, even way later.
