This will probably be slightly long for context. I am in a long term relationship with my girlfriend of about 4 years now. Relationahip wise everything is going amazing, aside from sex. We didnt start having sex until around 2 years into our relationship as I helped her get over bad trauma from a religious upbringing, and even then barely as she stil is not over it fully. It was great the first times, then she got on antidepressanta which killed her libido for about a year until she got off them, and her libido kinda never returned, according to her; at best we have sex 2 times a month, usually once, and every time its great (although we have a long way to go we both quite suck at it lmao), she says she’s demisexual because of all the external stress and undiagnosed likely chronic pain she currently has, and I’m trying every day to help her through it to feel better, and during sex I always do my best to make her feel good about her body etc, and I have helped her, just feels like not enough and I wish I could do more.
Compared to me, I’m horny pretty much all the time, and no matter how much I get off by myself, doesnt fix the issue, it’s just much better to see my partner enjoy herself as that gets me going, so getting off by myself works but it’s very very mid, so combined with her current libido this ends up at me asking if we have sex today, getting rejected and she feels bad cause shes not up to it, then I have to tell her to not feel bad cause she’s still depressed and in pain etc also its her autonomy and consent too and such, though on a personal level I cant help but feel like an asshole because no matter how much I handle this, then still I’m hyperhorny and it just feels annoying to the point I wish I could control it at the switch of a button and only make it appear when she’s also turned on lol, I dont want to be a narcissistic piece of shit and I’ve heard plenty of people manage relationships with differing libidos, hell ofc I’d still love her a lot even if she went volcel, but 50% of the time she wants to have sex with me there just isnt that drive, while 50% she doesnt; I have no clue how to help her with that and she doesnt either she kinda made peace with it, and combined with our current external situation, we’ve been barely intimate and I can tell it’s been taking a toll in that regard, idk wish I had a ‘plan’, but I’m slightly very horny all the time but also have my own sexual trauma so im not exactly an example lmao
Would appreciate any outside POV, I’m quite prudish about this but it will help me a lot and obviously feel free to criticize any brainworms you spotted, thank you a lot comrades
Weed gang
Weed has been pretty helpful for self-medicating, but didn’t help with libido.
I’m now on esketamine and tirzepatide and I’m shocked by how quickly inflammation seems to be calming down. My knees don’t instantly hurt the moment I put any load at all on them, wow!
Interesting, do you have arthritis or something? A friend might be helped by this 🤔
Do you smoke weed? Edibles seem to do it for me libido wise, maybe it’s something about the specific variety of weed
I don’t. I have ME/CFS and Fibromyalgia, but this should also work for arthritis.
Glp-1 drugs have an incredibly powerful anti-inflammatory effect, even before any potential weight loss begins.
The goal of esketamine treatment is to essentially constantly have a micro dose in your system supported by weekly regular doses, and while it’s typically prescribed for treatment resistant depression or PTSD, it also has powerful effects on things like migraines, chronic pain, neuropathy…
I’m a month into esketamine and 2 weeks into tirzepatide. I haven’t had a migraine in about 2 weeks, and basic acetominophen now actually fixes my headaches instead of doing nothing. I don’t tap my feet as much, and my legs aren’t so restless in bed. I can stand up and walk around without instant pain. I can even kneel without it being a week-ruining event.
I have a dry flower vape (SuB Volcano) and edibles and neither one seems to impact my libido too strongly, at least not to the level that it does for my wife.
Interesting 🤔 I do sometimes think a lot of disabilities have an underlying genetic component that alters reactions to drugs and sickness. I’d even bet most persistent genetic diseases are some hidden code to survive an ancient, deadly pathogen. A lot of science lately has been finding weird little quirks like this.
I feel like almost all of my personal problems are well targeted by cannabis but nothing else really.
There seems to be a lot of not yet understood interaction between the brain and the rest of the body.
The apparent mechanism of action for (es)ketamine is being an NDMA glutamate receptor antagonist, which allows for more glutamate release in your brain that signals other stuff to cause rapid synapse growth restoring brain pathways.
But it also increases the rate of cleanup in the glymphatic system of the brain, which is dysfunctional in people with depression and some other disorders. The glymphatic system is one of the brain’s cleanup systems and it’s supposed to flush out CRGP, the protein that’s associated with causing migraines, and esketamine can improve the ability of this system to flush out this and other chemicals.