Source: the tibetan book of the dead
I die all the time these days I guess
When you sneeze while peeing and your stream flies up
Fingernails and toenails become lustreless? That’s a paddling.
Cornea of the eyes begin to cloud over? That’s a paddling.
Hair on nape of the neck grows upwards? That’s a paddling.
Urinating, defecating, and sneezing simultaneously? Oh, you better believe that’s a paddling.I’m glad you’re reading it. Which author?
It’s the Penguin Classics edition, translated by gyurme dorje.
The first 140 pages are a complete slog to read through, but it’s pretty interesting overall. I’ve read a condensed version of the Pali canon and a lot of Thick Nat Han, so i can at least identify a few of the deities and Buddhas that keep getting namedropped in the beginning.
If I hadn’t, the first chapters would have been completely impossible to get through.
I won’t say it’s easier, this is the one I have:
Don’t get hung up on the deities. Your brain may perceive something from your culture.
if one’s urine falls in two forks
I’ve had this happen to me infrequently since I was a teenager, maybe like averaging out to once per year (although that would probably make me overdue at present), and this is the first time I’ve ever heard anyone else acknowledge it’s a thing that can happen. I have no idea what causes it but it sucks enormously because when you have two streams going different directions you will invariably pee on something you don’t intend to. In my old age and wisdom I’ve learned that frantically racing to get as close to the bowl as possible is a good compromise between the discomfort of trying to stop peeing midway and the apathy of just resigning to piss all over the place with intent to clean it up after.
Urethral stricture or meatal stenosis.
Signs of impending death:
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shitting, pissing, and sneezing
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shitting and cumming
Signs of not impending death:
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shitting and pissing
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shitting and sneezing
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pissing and sneezing
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cumming and sneezing
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Oh god, Im gonna die!
Counterpoint - if I don’t exfoliate my t-zone I’m pretty sure I’ll die, so kinda catch-22 there
Tried this just now and it just took a screenshot
So many covid symptoms in there.
