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You shouldn’t
Because my name and face are on the side of a milk carton from 1988.
Please help me escape this milk carton!
Why should I trust you?
Don’t, I’ll fuck you over if it benefits me.
Because, statistically, most people can be trusted. The number comes in around 85%. Sally, the other 15% really ruin things for everyone else.
Don’t get me fucking started on Sally.
And don’t get ME started on autocorrect!
Have you seen this face? This is a trustworthy face. It’s so trustworthy, you don’t even need to see it to trust it!
See? Now you know, and now you trust me! It’s like magic!
