• @Grangle1@lemm.ee
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        226 days ago

        Five young recruits find the five golden Switch cartridges.

        Recruit 1 is walloped by a big tie-wearing gorilla after eating its entire banana hoard.

        Recruit 2 grows too big after eating a prototype actual Super Mushroom and turns into a Toad.

        Recruit 3 is rejected after touching the Triforce and being sucked into the Evil Realm.

        Recruit 4 loses an IRL series of WarioWare games played in a giant replica TV.

        Recruit 5 is hired after returning the free Switch 2 prototype they were given despite initially being rejected for painting graffiti on the wall with Splatoon paint.

      • @Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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        156 days ago

        I’m already on AMCs website, trying to preorder my ticket, and emailing customer service about why they haven’t started accepting preorders to a movie that hasn’t even been conceptualized yet.

        • Iapar
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          76 days ago

          You have to buy amiibos to have a chance of finding one. Everybody knows that.

    • Altima NEO
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      96 days ago

      walking with a cane and rolling up to the gates and everything

    • experbia
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      35
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      6 days ago

      Mario Maker 3 will be the foundation of every Mario title from here on out - it’s Mario As A Service! Levels will be generated and stored in the blockchain, as NFTs, so you can make, sell and trade rare levels! Make your levels memorable by describing them to our AI Waluigi, who will take your descriptions and generate a level for a mere 13 USD worth of Platinum Nintencoins, tradeable on Coinbase soon! Don’t forget to keep your Gold Nintencoin balances topped off to make sure you have the best chances to get rare powerups! Try downloading our new companion app so Princess Peach can watch you use your phone and listen to your real-life conversations. If she likes what she hears, you’ll get free Nintencoins, so be sure to become a top Brand Ambassador for the best value! Wow MBA-level business sure is amazing! It’s weird that we keep losing customers though… can we make it illegal for customers to leave us, please? I learned in business school that getting what you want is just a matter of killing the right whistleblowers.

    • @Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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      186 days ago

      “What super mario needs is LOOT BOXES!!! Yes, you jump and hit the question box, and now you can pay for a fire flower. If not, you get a coin!”

      • @groucho
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        45 days ago

        This whole thread makes me so mad. Well done.

  • @Etterra@lemmy.world
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    396 days ago

    It would be nice if he handed it down to somebody who wasn’t such a jackass about emulators and leaks, but Nintendo is notoriously abusively litigious, like worse than Disney, so I’m not going to get my hopes up.

    • Chozo
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      546 days ago

      It’s not that sort of hand-down. Miyamoto isn’t in charge of Nintendo as a whole; he just heads some of the creative departments. The legal/business end of things are still going to be largely under Furukawa.

      • @cm0002@lemmy.world
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        286 days ago

        The legal/business end of things are still going to be largely under Furukawa.

        Oh, so this guy?

        Yup, he def looks like a no fun asshole

        • Chozo
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          166 days ago

          LOL, he definitely gives off “hall monitor” energy. But for what it’s worth, he is 20 years younger than Miyamoto, so maybe he’s still in the cards.

        • @groucho
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          45 days ago

          Strong “the meeting will continue until I have broken you” energy.

      • @ChapulinColorado@lemmy.world
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        106 days ago

        Why is no one buying Mario Universe x Star Wars: return of the Palpatine clones? Better mark up Disney plus and park passes to keep investors happy for the next 6 weeks, our longest term plan yet.

  • @Otakulad@lemmy.world
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    75 days ago

    I mean, the man is 71 years old, is probably very wealthy, and wants to have fun. Let the man retire.

  • Altima NEO
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    46 days ago

    I wonder if hes ever looking to retire, or if he’ll continue working till he cant anymore?

    • @Grangle1@lemm.ee
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      56 days ago

      Wouldn’t be surprised if he’s waiting to find that younger person he feels he could pass his position to so that he can finally step down and retire, but he’s looking for JUST the right person.