• tone212_@aussie.zone
    12·
    9 个月前

    Taken from my backyard using iPhone 3 second exposure. Can’t really see it to the naked eye but insane on camera.

  • MeanElevator@aussie.zoneEnglish
    11·
    9 个月前

    Went out for dinner tonight, Korean BBQ. On our way out my kids helped out a server who was carrying too many things, when I was paying the tab.

    The owner/manager told me I had a beautiful family and that my kids were super polite.

    I nearly broke down crying.

  • StudSpud The Starchy@aussie.zoneEnglish
    10·
    9 个月前

    So, I have a small guilty pleasure now: I downloaded tiktok and am loving all the videos with pets tbh.

    TW: DV

    But I watch one video by an Aussie lady about women’s rights and whatnot, and now tiktok thinks that’s all I want to watch. 😭 Like, 4b movement stuff, the rate of homicides, etc. It’s interesting but like, also triggering of course. I’m in the process of re-teaching the algorithm or whatever.

    But I also feel like I don’t have a right to talk about my experience, not because of what they’ve said or anything like that. But because my abusive ex was male and male presenting for the VAST majority of our relationship, until the last 6 months where they only came out to me about being a tran-woman. So, like, they’re part of this super marginalised group, having told their friends I was transphobic. I don’t feel like I can talk about it with anyone (besidesy dad and my partner), without, like, playing into that lie they told. I believe they are, of course, trans, but also that they use it as an excuse to not take accountability for their heinous actions. That if I did file a police report, that I’d be called transphobic and a false reporter. What a strange position to be in. Just needed to have a small ranty rant about it, because I haven’t seen anyone else anywhere have, or talk about, an experience like mine without also being transphobic. I always feel like if I talk about it, if I don’t use the right pronouns, or if I clarify “well they were male, but are now female” it’s about women-on-women DV. Which, it wasn’t, but is it?

    Ugh, just gonna keep saving up for a psych appointment and hopefully I can start feeling better about being in this tiny bubble of one.

    • Thornburywitch@aussie.zoneEnglish
      8·
      9 个月前

      A dickhead is a dickhead, no matter what gender they are/were/present as. Bad behaviour/manners should be called out. There’s far too much victim blaming happening. Not a situation I’ve ever faced, so please take that for what its worth, if anything.

    • Alamutjones@aussie.zone
      6·
      9 个月前

      Them being trans doesn’t mean that what they did to hurt you wasn’t also abusive. Women - including trans women - are entirely capable of abuse.

      I believe you. You deserved better.

    • melbaboutown@aussie.zone
      2·
      9 个月前

      DV absolutely occurs in queer/same sex relationships, and women absolutely do abuse partners. Dickheads come in every stripe and nobody is automatically exempt from being abusive due to their identity.

      Police are pretty shit with DV/SA reports in general and there’s no guarantee that a report would go anywhere. But if you felt you wanted to report there are LGBTIA+ liason officers now and if there were sexual offences you can talk to SOCIT.

      It’s really hard when your abuser is marginalised but it absolutely does happen, marginalized people can and do punch down on other people, and you have every right to talk about what was done to you. You’re not going after her because she’s trans. You were harmed by what she did, and struggling to even talk about it for fear of feeding into existing transphobic narratives.

  • Alamutjones@aussie.zone
    10·
    9 个月前

    I’ve been vaguely sick for like, a week and a half. I almost wish I was sicker, because then I’d have an excuse to opt out of things rather than trying to brute-force through them all

  • Bottom_racer@aussie.zone
    9·
    9 个月前

    Heading to a big (and free!) outdoor park bass party tonight and easy to get to. Always good vibes.

    Hopefully the fun police won’t shut it down.

    Really good to see a crew start thowing these again.

    Which calls for a rave choon.

    Dancing is healing

  • Gibsonisafluffybutt@aussie.zone
    9·
    9 个月前

    Crashing soon so I can be up at 6am. Interview Monday requires me to be in the city at 9am and I want to have some practice in advance.

    Enjoy your evening everyone ❤️

  • AJ Sadauskas @lemmy.mlEnglish
    9·
    9 个月前

    Am I biased in saying crazy cat ladies (and gents) are the best people?

    Anyway, little Spunky got a surprise today when his mum got an Amazon delivery today. A big new box for a little kitty 🐈📦

  • Mittens_meow@aussie.zone
    8·
    9 个月前

    So I have to decide if a 4 hour a day commute a few days a week is ok or to look for another job. They changed the rules on me and went all return to office. It’s a damn tech job - no office presence even required.

    I don’t want to give up my dog :-(

    • Nath@aussie.zone
      10·
      9 个月前

      24 hours:
      7 hours sleep.
      1 hour preparing for work.
      8 hours working.
      4 hours commuting.
      2 hours preparing and eating food.

      That leaves 2 hours for everything else. I could not do this.

    • Catfish@aussie.zone
      7·
      9 个月前

      I did almost that for about 6 months when I got my first ‘real’ job before finding a place to move. Almost killed me, especially since Sat got lost to house hunting. Zero life. Do not recommend.

      • Rusty Raven @aussie.zoneM
        5·
        9 个月前

        I did a few months of 9 hour days with a 3 hour commute. It paid the bills, but I can’t say it was much fun. It did have a major bonus that I could get time off to go to job interviews though. When I strarted my new job with 8 hours work 15 minutes from home it felt like I’d gone part time!

    • Rusty Raven @aussie.zoneM
      6·
      9 个月前

      Ouch. It might be ok for a couple of days a week but it is not ideal. You basically have to write off those days completely and you also can’t do any of the little chores you would have otherwise done around or after work either (things like doing your washing) so you lose a little bit of other days too.

    • melbaboutown@aussie.zone
      4·
      9 个月前

      Yikes. It sounds like it would massively cut into the rest of your life for no good reason.

      Is it possible to start hunting for a new job on the down low now - and then either use a job offer as leverage to keep work from home, or jump to another role?

    • tone212_@aussie.zone
      3·
      9 个月前

      If it’s two days a week out of five, it’s do-able but that’s still a massive loss of free time. Is this travelling by PT? Can you start work on PT in order to spend less time at the office?

      • Mittens_meow@aussie.zone
        3·
        9 个月前

        Car to train. Not sure that the Monash fwy would be faster, plus getting parking somewhere. Seems not negotiatble, message is being reinforced via multiple levels of upper management. Wondering if it’s an excuse to reduce head count without redundancies.

        • AJ Sadauskas@aus.social
          3·
          9 个月前

          @Mittens_meow That’s pretty horrendous. In a previous life, I was doing around 2.5- to 3-hours commute each day, and that was bad enough!

          How are you enjoying the role otherwise? Are there any other issues?

          • Mittens_meow@aussie.zone
            2·
            9 个月前

            I actually really like the role, it’s different and challenging and I love learning new stuff. It’s super disappointing that this has happened.

            • tombruzzo@aussie.zone
              5·
              9 个月前

              I was in this sort of situation and moved to an all remote job. As much as I liked the old place the lifestyle improvements and flexibility was worth it

    • Gibsonisafluffybutt@aussie.zone
      9·
      9 个月前

      It sounds like a really tumultuous time. I hope everything works out for you. Sometimes people from super troubled backgrounds can be a bit better when they have a change of scenery.

      Hopefully.

    • melbaboutown@aussie.zone
      6·
      9 个月前

      As someone who was regularly stolen from by flatmates - get yourself a small safe, keep it out of view under your bed, and bike chain it to your bedframe so it can’t be carried off. Journals, wallet, money or cards, ID, small electronics, sentimental items, prescription medication etc go in here when not in use. Keep your phone with you. If cost is a barrier you could also just get a lockbox of some kind, like a lockable toolbox. You can also get small stash containers that look like everyday items.

      Also get yourself a subtle lanyard/wallet chain to keep your room key on you and lock your bedroom door when you go shower. Like, don’t be obvious about it and cause tension, you don’t want him to see you do these things or act weird like you’re sus of him. But just don’t be casual about easy access to your room or belongings until you know you can trust him. If he ever notices just keep it light and say it’s out of habit.

      “Haha, just a holdover from the old place. (The lockbox?) This is a high crime area, you heard about that burglary. (But if he knows about your lockbox? HMMM.) Oh that? It’s habit, if I don’t remember to lock up my room everytime I forget to do the main door! If I didn’t have this chain/lanyard I’d lose my key! Nah, I just like taking my phone to read on the toilet/play music while I’m in the shower.”

      If this turns out not to be needed, great! But having some self protective strategies might help you cope better until you’ve sussed the new guy out.

      Edit: Oh yeah and password your computer. Hit the shortcut for lock anytime you walk away from it.

      And since you work. If he ever asks, you’re broke. You’ve already spent your paycheck on rent, food, a replacement part that was desperately needed for repairs. Sorry homie. I got nothing left to lend you. Keep purchases of anything nice hidden or save it for when you’re living on your own. You don’t want someone racking your headphones or sneakers.

        • melbaboutown@aussie.zone
          2·
          9 个月前

          No problem! Man, the things you have to do when sharehousing… all of these are just suggestions in case anything works for you btw. I just wish someone had warned me.

          For the headphones you can have a magazine holder sat between the monitor and the wall, and if someone knocks pop the headphones in there to keep them kind of hidden from casual view from the door before you answer. Perhaps slipped behind a single magazine so that sits in front if it needs more cover.

          Not sure of your pocket situation but a key wallet might enclose your bunch of keys and deaden the noise. Also with some lanyards you can get keyrings with a clip on it, so you can remove the parts you want and clip a secondary keyring on and off your main when it’s needed - or just buy one. If you need a smaller option to quiet the jingles there’s this.

  • dumblederp@aussie.zone
    8·
    9 个月前

    My reddit accounts got caught up in r/australia’s ban evasion AI nonsense and I got mega banned, no more helpful comments for people bad at google I guess. I liked being helpful there. It’ll give me more time to be helpful elsewhere I guess.

    • TinyBreak@aussie.zone
      3·
      9 个月前

      You’ve described my relationship with carsaustralia perfectly. Just with a bit of added snark towards Mazda diesels.

      • dumblederp@aussie.zone
        6·
        9 个月前

        What I think happened:

        • First account banned on r/australia only by AI for inciting violence on r/australia for technical discussion of BJJ. I appealed the ban.
        • Second account, I messaged the r/australia mods to ban the account so I didn’t get busted for ban evasion. Ban given.
        • First account has AI ban revoked. I eventually make a comment on r/australia, ban evasion bots see the IP or email address attached to the account matches their shitlist, bots go into ban evasion mode, accounts get permanently suspended.
        • I had about seven reddit accounts. A bunch of novelty ones made during lockdown. I requested bans from r/australia on these accounts, I only got temp 28 day bans on some. I eventually made a comment on r/australia, got the ban evasion message from r/australia auto-mod, replied impolitely that I’d already reqested a ban months ago and I was glad to be banned. All my reddit accounts got nuked. New accounts from IP or email get nuked. New account from temp email and vpn is fine.

        i think.

          • dumblederp@aussie.zone
            2·
            9 个月前

            Look it is what it is. With the API changes and IPO, I feel reddit has been circling the drain. Mods needing to use these bots is a sign of the end times. The new account created isn’t allowed to post anywhere due to age and karma, which’ll put genuine new users off IMO.

  • melbaboutown@aussie.zone
    8·
    9 个月前

    Health is still absolutely caning me. Constant pain and not able to keep on top of things. I hate using disposable products… Landfill and paying for stuff that gets literally thrown in the bin… but at the moment it’s kind of necessary.

    I’m cutting down on that wherever I can but it’d be nice if I had a little countertop dish drawer to run every time I had a full load. It would save water too. Wonder if I could get it funded. I’ve been budgeting well lately so could perhaps save to get one but vet bills always take priority and it also seems I’ve got stuck in tightarse mode.

    • Seagoon_@aussie.zoneOP
      5·
      9 个月前

      hugs, we do what we can do.

      have you been able to go outside and look at the aurora? 😊🌌

      • melbaboutown@aussie.zone
        2·
        9 个月前

        Yeah, it just sucks you know.

        The pics are pretty but I haven’t gone outside. It’s a bit fresh tonight, feral neighbours have been screaming and the fuzzball would try to follow me out