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Doug Holland@lemmy.worldM to AMUSING, INTERESTING, OUTRAGEOUS, or PROFOUND@lemmy.worldEnglish · 7 天前

The holy foreskin of Christ

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The holy foreskin of Christ

lemmy.world

Doug Holland@lemmy.worldM to AMUSING, INTERESTING, OUTRAGEOUS, or PROFOUND@lemmy.worldEnglish · 7 天前
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  • Formfiller@lemmy.world
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    7 天前

    Find it. Let’s clone that dude and let him settle all this bullshit with these religious crazies

    • DrSoap@lemmy.world
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      7 天前

      Too late. Someone ate it.

      • Formfiller@lemmy.world
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        7 天前

        Lmao

  • spacegoat@lemmy.world
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    7 天前

    Christians are dolts

  • Zozano@aussie.zone
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    7 天前

    What stand does it give me?

    【FORESKIN 500】

    『Five Hundred』

  • Jimbabwe@lemmy.world
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    7 天前

    Another roadside attraction?

  • SkyezOpen@lemmy.world
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    7 天前

    LEAVING OUT THE BEST PART. The way they authenticated the foreskin was by tasting it.

    • /home/pineapplelover@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      7 天前

      Sauce?

      • SkyezOpen@lemmy.world
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        7 天前

        • torrigan@piefed.social
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          7 天前

          wow so much of religion is just people going along with it like “yeah this is normal I totally taste holiness. so I’m going to heaven right?”

          • /home/pineapplelover@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            6 天前

            We should find a way to turn the tasting of baby Jesus’s foreskin into a common phrase

        • ChanchoManco@lemmy.zip
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          6 天前

          Foreskin crunchers sounds an awful lot like some kind of snack.

        • AWistfulNihilist@lemmy.world
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          7 天前

          So … like bacos?

    • Hell_nah_brother@thelemmy.club
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      7 天前

      Nah nah fuck you, fuck this ritualistic barbarism shit, I’m eating fucking Christ. 🤢

    • Midnight Wolf@lemmy.world
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      7 天前

      I’m out, too much internet today

    • Bluefalcon@discuss.tchncs.de
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      7 天前

      The lord’s foreskin has a slight spice to it. Great addition to any soup or stew.

      • MrSelfDestruct@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        7 天前

        Fuck! I forgot to pick up some dried christ foreskin for my recipe.

        • nieceandtows@programming.dev
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          7 天前

          So literally, Jesus Christ in a handbasket?

        • Bluefalcon@discuss.tchncs.de
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          7 天前

          Just a dash, don’t want you to catch the spirit.

    • vala@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      7 天前

      Wat

  • Executive Chimp@discuss.tchncs.de
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    7 天前

    Or, according to one account, it ascended with him and became the rings of Saturn.

    • Yew@lemmy.world
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      7 天前

      Religion may sound a bit goofy at times, but this part makes so much sense.

    • TrackinDaKraken@lemmy.world
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      7 天前

      I’m happy the TRUTH is finally getting out.

    • apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world
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      7 天前

      Proving the miracle of Jesus introducing his disciples to crack.

  • Widdershins@lemmy.world
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    7 天前

    So how many other foreskins were saved in the off chance that the kid was going to grow up and become famous? Who was collecting these foreskins back then? Do we have a modern-day creep waiting for the perfect moment to sell their Justin Beiber, Jaden Smith, or Ed Furlong foreskins? I know with newly invented DNA it would be trivial to confirm whose is whose. But back in 300AD you could only take the word of some guy with a bunch of foreskins that the one he is selling you is, in fact, the real deal.

    • a_non_monotonic_function@lemmy.world
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      7 天前

      Dude here dislikes collectors.

      • Widdershins@lemmy.world
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        7 天前

        I don’t dislike collectors I just can’t fathom a relic lasting that long and not being eaten and replaced with a pig asshole somewhere and possibly a few times along the way.

        • Jimbabwe@lemmy.world
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          7 天前

          I don’t dislike collectors

          Psshhh… That’s rich coming from the guy trying to talk me out of hoarding every foreskin I come across

        • a_non_monotonic_function@lemmy.world
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          7 天前

          Look, some of us have the self-control required not to eat the foreskin in our collections.

        • BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today
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          7 天前

          Eaten? That’s how you think it would disappear?

          • derek@infosec.pub
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            7 天前

            You’ll never see calamari the same way again.

            • Widdershins@lemmy.world
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              7 天前

              never buy gribenes from a mohel.

    • jdr@lemmy.ml
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      7 天前

      Were why of those fuckers foretold by a star and foreign kings with myrrh?

  • NewDark@lemmy.today
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    7 天前

    OK. So normally these “Google the thing” is about something different and the setup is misdirection (ie: Google 40% cops).

    That is… legitimately more information about this. Wtf?

  • newton@feddit.online
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    7 天前

    Not stolen, just removed. THAT was the year that they examined many relics for authenticity, due to better age determinations. Many relicks failed in those tests, was regularly on the news at the time

    • ChanchoManco@lemmy.zip
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      6 天前

      Yeah came to comment something on the same line, it was conveniently stolen when we got more tools and knowledge to test these kind of things.

  • qyron@sopuli.xyz
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    7 天前

    I don’t know what is done to the removed skin but I seriously doubt it is kept in any way.

    But this is about relics and at some point someone made the calculations and realized the claimed number of pieces of the holy cross held in different churches and monasteries throughout Europe would be enough to put together a small forest.

    • BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today
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      7 天前

      “A perfect cut! Here, save this, it will be a collector’s item someday.”

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