I’ve felt rancor and bitterness towards most of my surroundings for all of recent memory and have now realized that it’s starting to affect my relationship (im growing impatient, ready to fly off the handle, a little defensive) and i feel like im in some way broken or “unfit” for a relationship. Very important to mention that i forgot to take my meds for an extended period and now they are virtuslly useless bbecause im a dimwit and am unable to properly remind myself of my fairly important emotional stability pills; This lack of pharmaceutical support (all a byproduct of my own actions) i think also plays a very big role in my current situation.

How do i not lash out or ruin my relationship with my partner because of my general unhappiness and, for lack of a better term, hate for and towards everyone else around me

  • KRat@lemmygrad.mlOP
    3·
    3 days ago

    actually wait a sec, so i write a post about how i fear that my rage towards the oppresive forces that surround me is bleeding through and makes me feel like i might be ruining my relationships, and your response is to speculate on my partner’s political interests & subtly hint that my relationship wont last (with the utilizing of the proposition “assuming this is longterm”, you underhandedly imply that it wont be longterm, else you wouldnt feel the need to specify this detail.)?

    I don’t need your judgement, i asked for advice. If you have nothing actually constructive to say, kindly shut up.

    • vyitnoomyr@lemmygrad.ml
      2·
      3 days ago

      Wait what I meant you should flee the country together

      Those are like the only countries it’s even ethical and feasible to move to.

      I guess there is kind of my own brutal logic that I couldn’t remain in America and have a happy relationship with a liberal embedded in there. But that wasn’t my intended message at all. It was seriously just asking, do you think ditching the whole environment together is feasible?

      I’m not like super amazed by Russia it’s just not RUINOUS for the next generation there, so you’re not just like, exploiting the population as an asset-laden expat. You’d need to have a career set up and shit. I’m just saying buying a condo or something is unimaginably cheap versus US property market. Which is unstable and based on blood money anyways. Do you get my reasoning? It is a pretty hard break from most people’s priorities so I figured I’d ask before potentially offering one (maybe completely unlikely) solution. Besides not everyone even WANTS a long-term relationship. IDGAF if they do or don’t, I guess I’m glad to see someone else so violently committed to their relationship. That’s dope

      I honestly hoped by coming back on the English non-coder/market related internet I could convince someone to do it lol the idea of based internet ppl headed into such a dubious retirement situation makes me kinda get a knot in my stomach. This probably sounds ridiculous 😭 but I have noticed a lot of people’s relatives are hopelessly chuddy & make them unhappy. They could instead be plaintively begging them to fly back across the Pacific before they are 6 feet under 😀

      • KRat@lemmygrad.mlOP
        3·
        3 days ago

        ohhh ic sorry, i had misunderstood and thought you were implying something about my relationship, since it’s not the first time people online have judged me or my partner on the basis of our being together, mb ><

        Anyway, on your advice, we were thinking moreso moving to china tbh, sorry again for misunderstanding >< ty for your advice ^^

        • vyitnoomyr@lemmygrad.ml
          1·
          2 days ago

          Hope it all goes well! China is difficult so make sure to do a lot of research and talk to people who’ve moved there. Hard to get a green card even if you’re married to someone who has citizenship. OTOH it is flat-out impossible to do the reverse (this is tough to watch despite being a characteristically charming video from the channel). China is far more fair than say, first world countries, which look for arrests and stuff rather than only convictions. (Do not ask why I researched that.) I’m sure you’ll take it seriously, but just saying. I chose complete no-brainers. You just buy Russian property and get a visa it’s nuts. VN is roughly more like China 20 years ago in terms of visas.

          I was pushing China more on a friend of mine in Eastern Europe but he was super dismissive of his academic opportunities. A real shame. That would be the best route I think, especially considering how their admissions system works!! Just saying if you happen to talk to anyone in like, Hungary, Serbia, Bulgaria, it’s kinda urgent

          • KRat@lemmygrad.mlOP
            1·
            2 days ago

            China would be much more difficult, including the language, since russian generally has more in common with the languages i already know ><< (my partner knows much more about the moving, for now it’s a very distant possibility), although i’ve researched that China and Vietnam are less outwardly queerphobic than Russia, which would very much be a factor to consider since im trans and my partner is more fem presenting.

            I do actually know someone near those parts, they’re Romanian but unfortunately they’re an orthodox christian zealot and proclaim themselves as anarcho-capitalist (they also think china is actually just “nazi germany but worse” because sinophobic talking points. they ought to hav a fuck ton of cognitive dissonance since they are also gay :P), but if i do meet someone else i will tell u ^^ I think china might actually be better for my personal education since imperial schools will ultimately regurgitate imperialist talking points.

            Also the romanian guy i know is t a friend of mine i swear he just was in my class YwY