- cross-posted to:
- dating@lemmy.world
- usa@lemmy.ml
- aboringdystopia@lemmy.world
- cross-posted to:
- dating@lemmy.world
- usa@lemmy.ml
- aboringdystopia@lemmy.world
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USians will abstain from sex or romance rather than stop larping as rich
In my world a date is drinking beer cans after eating some kebab
I do kind of miss when my dates could take place entirely outside a Späti with a walk back to one of our flats if it went well.
All the comments hating on people for their date location choices but I mean… before I left the US in February, taking my wife out to sushi and a movie would easily cost $200. And we don’t even drink! If you’re trying to have a fun time and go to a bar afterwards, it’s gonna be $200-$300 easy.
Sure, you could split a Big Mac in a public park, but that’s not what most people think about when they hear “date.”
Yeah shit is hella expensive nowadays. Def easy to spend $60-80 on a meal for two after tip in a non-chain restaurant.
Truth.
My partner and I went out last weekend - one cocktail, one cannabis beverage, two entrees: $120.
Costco date night. they get a hotdog and a soda. all the refills and samples they want, my treat, while we walk around and i look at bulk socks and underwear.
comrade fancy with the costco membership
There’s a law (at least in California, maybe federal?) that sez you can’t be members’ only where alcohol and pharmaceuticals are concerned, so you should be able to get in for booze and antidepressants, even if they won’t let you get socks.
costco pharmacy is accessible to anyone in all states, looks like 14 states let you buy alcohol as a non member.
Oh, this is more statistics bullshitting, the kind Gould complained about decades ago wrt variation.
14% of Americans say the average date costs them nothing, up from 12% a year ago. At the other end of the spectrum, 14% say a typical date costs $300 or more, up from 11% in 2025.
It’s high income people drawing up the mean.
But I’m also skeptical of 1) the implication this is self-reported 2) the broad measurements that include grooming before the date for instance 3) the lack of publicly available methodology 4) the clear ragebait advertising BMO is doing here
You’re not dating because you’re cheap and/or can’t think of low/no-cost date ideas, I’m not dating because I realized engagement with The Apps was making life worse, we are not the same.
yeah but if you just do a date that sucks and guarantees you wont get laid it wont be that expensive
retrvn to craigslist personals
Craigslists’s true sin was user anonymity even to Craigslist, and no algorithmic manipulation
Communications platforms must be replaced with Content Delivery platforms
I’m really glad that my idea of a date is “play TTRPGs with other autistic trans girls until we know each other well enough that i can come over to her place and watch gay cartoons with her while we cuddle.”
“take off your shoes, we’re playing smash bros with only pokeballs”
yeah if you go to a “nice” place but splitting a sando and walking in the park is still pretty cheap
sounds tough to get someone to agree to that, if you can even find a person among the bots or someone worth your time in the flood of garbage, depending on who you’re trying to date.
Are you trying to find a compatible person for lifelong companionship, or are you trying to find a shallow materialistic person to fuck, where you set a precedent of a transactional relationship?
the former, but neither is readily available. nobody else masks.
Anyone who sticks up their nose specifically at the cheapness of something is not worth dating for very long. The perception that “all prospective dates are looking for an expensive arrangement that the other person pays for” is defeatist and can easily lend itself to confirmation bias, or worse.
As for masking, doing things outdoors, especially during the day, will have the same effect. And sticking to outdoors is not as much of a restriction as it may sound.
I have a friend who’s a trans man, and he started dating another trans man (baby leftist) a handful of months ago, and was telling me about all these dates they did that were just anarchist calisthenics, i.e. exploring how they could break rules and taboos and social conventions. It sounded fantastic, bro is doing it absolutely right.
if they’re not masking around other people it isn’t safe to be around them privately. you don’t magically stop being a disease vector when you catch feelings. the bar is under ground and the overwhelming majority of americans dig under it rather than protect themselves and their community.
in five years i’ve seen three other masks, including a hospital visit.
You just gotta hang out with the right people and flirt with all of them until something clicks. I don’t fuck with the apps.
Finding the right people is even harder than the apps
I’ve never really enjoyed restaurant dining. There’s a lot of other activities to do that aren’t this one traditional “date” format and it’s the restaurant that’s the majority of the cost.
USians are brainwashed into thinking they need a $200 experience to get to know someone. At that rate it’s cheaper to take half a day off to cook something fancy for a date.
Where I live there is luckily enough people who don’t want these expensive experiences so we get creative on what to do on a date.
$6-15 per drink, before $2/drink tip
$30 per person for mid level activity (mini golf, movie, paddle boat, Japanese garden, bowling)
$100 dinner. Sit down places cost more, so you’re looking at $15/item minimum and if you’re going on a date, it’s fun to try a few things, so don’t be stingy. Once you’ve spent $80 on an app, 2 entrees, and a fun third thing, you only have $20 left for tip
That’s already $200 before bubble tea dessert and karaoke
Do most people live in places where restaurants don’t run any cheaper than $30 a person? I have all kinds of options below $20 where I am that aren’t even chains.
The last time I was in Chicago for a few days, I made a point of going to a bunch of local places, none of them broke the bank.
What are people doing living in cities that are so arbitrarily expensive that they can’t afford anything? There are plenty of other options, and you’re going to meet a lot more class-conscious people outside the largest capitalist playgrounds anyway.
