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My wife was 16 years older than me. The stability and confidence was a big pro. She knew what she liked and wanted and wasn’t afraid of it.

She had to have a complete hysterectomy, she didn’t like the hormone replacement therapy. Her natural lubrication dried up and penetration became painful for her.

A huge con is that I became a widower at 39 years old after 11 years together. It can happen at any age but the odds go up the older you get.

Dated my landlady who was 30 years my senior. Pros:

1. She’s pretty cool with anything, having married/divorce with 2 kids shes pretty much lived her life. She was willing to try just about anything and I was allowed to date outside our relationship as well. I reckon she was just in it for the fun (sexual).
2. She’s financially stable, has a career and money so she doesn’t bitch about finances. She always covered the bill on our dates and even paid on my behalf for overseas trips together.
3. She has a life outside our relationship, so she’ll be going around for business trips and meeting clients. So she doesn’t have time to be clingy, giving me some ME time every coupl’a weeks. And I do appreciate my alone time.
4. Sexually very experience, she knows what she wants and easily takes control. I view that as a pro

Cons:

1. She treats you like a kid (which you are). She may cut in sometimes and advise you on what is “in your best interests”. I for one am not into people telling me what to do
2. Everybody mistakes her for my mom and because of the society we live in, it’s difficult to tell them we’re not related.
3. She pretty much calls the shots in everything, from where to go to what to eat. Since she knows shes paying for it anyway.

Almost everyone I’ve ever been attracted to was significantly older than me. I liked that they usually knew what they wanted and were straightforward about it, had direction in life, and I simply find men in a certain age range more physically attractive. What mattered most was how we got along and that we enjoyed each other’s company.

The pros and cons varied more by the individual relationship rather than by age. Age does not always correspond to maturity or responsibility. Looking back, I was definitely not as mature as I thought I was either, so there were times where they would be annoyed watching me make a big deal over something they already went through long ago and in hindsight, was not important at all. That, or they never outgrew that phase themselves. Sometimes there would be a mismatch in physical activity levels (I like to stay active and include sport in dates), although this is again dependent on the individual.

As @MuttMutt@lemmy.world pointed out, the risk of age-related health complications also increases and it’s heartbreaking to watch your partner experience them (my condolences to you).

Logically older is more experienced. Best blow job ever from someone 20 years older than me. Think of all the times she has sucked cock. Of course after every cock she sucked she got better at it.

Sorry for this non-answer, but I don’t think you will be able to generalize much on the topic of age, too many other dominant factors.

I’m not (and will never be) in any age gap relationship, but one major con is that it prevents other people from dating someone their age. I had two separate instances where a girl admitted she was interested in me but instead chose a much older man for what he could provide. Age gap relationships are unfair mainly to young men because they simply can’t compete with the older men in things like money and time. And if enough men don’t have options to date their age, they will then look for younger women, repeating the cycle.