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🍹Early to RISA 🧉@sh.itjust.worksM to Greentext@sh.itjust.works · 1 year ago

Anon's uncle is sick

sh.itjust.works

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Anon's uncle is sick

sh.itjust.works

🍹Early to RISA 🧉@sh.itjust.worksM to Greentext@sh.itjust.works · 1 year ago
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  • rockSlayer@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    There’s a story that Wong Wifu, the great Chinese martial artist… had a fight with a guy and beat him. Then the guy gave him this light tap. Wong looked at him and the guy just nodded. That was it. He had given him the death touch. Wong died.

    Then and there?

    No. About eighteen years later. That’s the thing about Dim Mak… you never know when it’s gonna take effect.

    • BananaTrifleViolin@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Statistically if you’re born, at some point you will die. Being born is deadly.

      • Maestro@fedia.io
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        1 year ago

        Life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% fatality rate

        • Klear@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Bullshit, it’s only about 93%

          • Telex@sopuli.xyz
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            1 year ago

            Only 93% so far.

            • SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de
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              1 year ago

              planning for a busy weekend?

          • UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml
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            1 year ago

            When did we run out of unique souls and added in NPCs?

      • Dalvoron@lemm.ee
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        7 months ago

        deleted by creator

        • Joeffect@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          It’s more than that… I know you were joking but …

          https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Estimates_of_historical_world_population

          Yeah it’s estimated but it’s a shit ton of people so it’s more like 99.9%

          • taladar@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            You underestimate the effects of population growth. There was a lot of time in prehistory but the population at any given point was tiny compared to today.

            • Num10ck@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              i remember an old article that said DNA shows that all current humans can be traced back to 7 women during the ice age.

              • meowMix2525@lemm.ee
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                1 year ago

                There were probably more around at the time, all the other bloodlines just died off.

              • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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                1 year ago

                And they were all neighbours in the same age and shared a WhatsApp group.

            • Joeffect@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              Those people were alive and died it doesn’t matter… There have been more people dead than are currently living by a lot.

              We don’t care how many people were alive back than compared to today. It’s the total amount to how many have died…

              • taladar@sh.itjust.works
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                1 year ago

                We don’t care how many people were alive back than compared to today.

                But that is exactly the ratio you claim to be 99.9% when in reality it is closer to 93%.

                • Joeffect@lemmy.world
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                  1 year ago

                  No your right, my bad I’m terrible at math and sick

          • Dalvoron@lemm.ee
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            7 months ago

            deleted by creator

        • r00ty@kbin.life
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          1 year ago

          Lies, damned lies, and statistics.

  • NegativeInf@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Blood for the blood god.

    • jabathekek@sopuli.xyz
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      1 year ago

      Tendies for the tendie throne.

  • jabathekek@sopuli.xyz
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    1 year ago

    Can I take a moment to talk to you about our one true lord and saviour, Satan?

    • Jolteon@lemmy.zip
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      1 year ago

      Is Jehovah witness Satan different from regular Christian Satan?

      • jabathekek@sopuli.xyz
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        1 year ago

        No, in such a way that neither of those denominations represent Satan correctly.

        • L3ft_F13ld!@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          1 year ago

          You’ve got me curious. Care to elaborate?

          • MutilationWave@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Satan seems to be the good guy in the Bible, given there’s scant evidence of a literal hell of eternal damnation. Even if any of this were real, god created hell, not Satan.

            Satan never destroyed the entire world or nuked cities or anything like that. I can’t think of a bad thing he does in the Bible except maybe the Job bet. And even then god is worse on that one.

            Here are the tenets of the Satanic Temple. You decide.

            • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works
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              1 year ago

              Eh, the concept of hell really varies a lot by denomination, from the classic burning hell in Catholicism to a more “internal” hell of separation from God in Eastern Orthodoxy. I personally subscribe a bit more to the latter than the former, because I don’t understand why a loving god would punish his children who disobey for eternity. In this latter view, Satan is merely an angel who rebelled and was kicked out of God’s presence, and thus his only goal is to ruin things for the rest of us.

            • L3ft_F13ld!@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              1 year ago

              I’ve seen the tenets and absolutely agree with them. Don’t think they seriously represent Satan though. I think the name is purely for shock. Religious types couldn’t fathom a satanist being a decent person.

        • Flax@feddit.uk
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          1 year ago

          How come?

          • jabathekek@sopuli.xyz
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            1 year ago

            Please refer to our pamphlet.

            • Flax@feddit.uk
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              1 year ago

              There’s no source attached

  • Caveman@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Blood for the blood god. Khorne loves him

  • HootinNHollerin@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    That totally happened

    • Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      It’s Greentext

  • unknown1234_5@kbin.earth
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    1 year ago

    just focus on the positive, you won’t be cold after you die.

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