• SuperDuper
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    9210 months ago

    If I woke up as a woman, regardless of who that woman is, I would masturbate.

    • @Makeitstop@lemmy.world
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      3410 months ago

      Carefully photoshop her face in from other pictures of her. Make them both real and fake at the same time.

      • @Agent641@lemmy.world
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        610 months ago

        Post nudes, but with some other woman’s face photoshopped on the body. The greatest troll would be that the nudes they seek are right in front of them, they just don’t know it.

    • Flying Squid
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      510 months ago

      I like all the men chiming in who think that Taylor Swift isn’t hot enough for them. Because I’m sure all the women interested in them are far more attractive than Taylor Swift, which is why they have such high standards.

      • @rambaroo@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        I mean, people are allowed to have preferences. I also find it hypocritical that the thread OP is acting like everyone else is super misogynistic when his first thought was to check himself out if he was Taylor Swift. Cause my first thought was to do something good with the billion dollars she has. Not that I think she’s a bad person or anything.

        Second thought was now I actually have musical talent, so I’d go play all her fancy guitars

        • @Algaroth@lemmy.world
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          010 months ago

          You’re such a hypocrite. If a woman woke up with a dick she would immediately jerk off. That’s the least odd part about my post.

      • @Thief_of_Crows@lemmy.ml
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        09 months ago

        I mean, she’s unattractive enough that I’d consider not going on a 2nd date if I wasn’t into her on the 1st. Where like a supermodel or whatever, I’d put up with not liking them for several months if she’s into me.

    • @Son_of_dad@lemmy.world
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      -2010 months ago

      She’s ok looking, body wise, fit but meh. I don’t even think she’s that pretty, just normal, average looking. But of course she has the makeup, etc. So she looks great onstage.

      Talented gal, but I’ve never thought she was hot

        • @Son_of_dad@lemmy.world
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          010 months ago

          I’m not saying she’s unattractive, I just don’t find her attractive myself. I can go for a walk in my city and find a dozen women I find hotter just on my walk. I mean she’s a talented musician, I don’t see why people are getting upset cause I wouldn’t fuck her. That’s not her appeal, there’s enough thots in the music industry, we don’t need every female singer to be fuckable

          • @Algaroth@lemmy.world
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            610 months ago

            I’m sure you are an 8 and I’m sure your wife would love to be rated as a 9. Look, this shit only makes you sound like a loser compensating for something. First you’re misogynistic about Taylor Swift and then you brag about how hot you and your wife are. It only makes you seem less fuckable irl.

              • @Algaroth@lemmy.world
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                510 months ago

                I think giving your opinion about every woman you see is misogynistic. You can see a picture of a woman without saying out loud whether or not you would like to fuck her, right?

                • @rambaroo@lemmy.world
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                  010 months ago

                  I find that pretty rich considering your first thought in this thread was to check out her body. I really don’t see how you’re much better than these other dudes.

              • Flying Squid
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                410 months ago

                I believe rating every woman you see on a 1-10 attractiveness scale is pretty misogynistic. Unless you do it just as frequently with men. How often do you do it with men?

      • @Algaroth@lemmy.world
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        -210 months ago

        Nobody asked. She’s not gonna fuck you anyway. If I had her body I’d go out of my way to make it known to everyone that I would never fuck you specifically.

        • @Son_of_dad@lemmy.world
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          10 months ago

          Ok, so wait, you’re mad cause I don’t want to fuck her? I mean do you? That’s kinda creepy. I appreciate her as a person and as an artist, but you seem hungup on her looks and fuckability, so clearly you’re the weirdo here. I See her and go “nice girl, very talented” but you go “omg I wish I could wake up as her so I could jack off with her body!” But I’m the one who’s wrong?

      • @thisbenzingring
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        -310 months ago

        Same. She isn’t my idea of beauty but not ugly. She has a nice feminine shape but I don’t really care one way or another. I couldn’t tell you any of her songs, I only know that one is something about never getting back together but I don’t know the tune, so might not even recognize it

  • @rjthyen@lemm.ee
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    2010 months ago

    Taking my top off? It’s what our do regardless of who I woke up as though.

  • @Amazinghorse@lemmy.world
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    1510 months ago

    100% I’m masturbating and checking myself out in the mirror while doing so.

    Then I’d buy myself all the things I wanted (assuming I wake up in her life and not just her body in my life).

    • @Thief_of_Crows@lemmy.ml
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      09 months ago

      Counterpoint: this is theft. Counter-counterpoint: still okay because she’s a billionaire. But like, imagine waking up as someone normal, and you go and spend all their money. That’d be fucked up.

      • @Amazinghorse@lemmy.world
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        19 months ago

        Those are all valid points. Calling it theft would be a good ethics debate though… Oh she would be getting a bad deal if she woke up in my body, in my life.

    • @LarmyOfLone@lemm.ee
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      510 months ago

      It’s fascist propaganda. It’s not just that they don’t like her endorcing Biden or the conspiracy theories, it’s also good distraction from real issues. It’s working really well too.

  • @Krauerking@lemy.lol
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    1210 months ago

    Honestly find how the real Taylor felt about actual issues and her fans as best as possible and then just put it out as a press piece.

    No more false figurehead that their conscious only exists as the imaginary paradox of all of their believers. People love to talk on her behalf on how she feels about things and it always seems to agree with them.
    I am breaking the swifties and giving a real person to look at and not a mascot.

  • @Agent641@lemmy.world
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    1110 months ago

    Presumably im being spooned by that sports man, so Id rip a massive fart on his dick and balls, then go to the dunny.

  • @dasgoat@lemmy.world
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    1110 months ago

    Transfer all wealth and assets to socialist causes, liquidize what I can and have. Have a stiff drink. Record a video where I declare myself loyal to the anticapitalist cause and the steps I took so far. All houses are now open to be ransacked come and get it.

    Then I dunno, turn the swifties into a paramilitary organization that will join the struggle against the capitalist class.

    That would be a pretty good day.

  • @Poppa_Mo@lemmy.world
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    1010 months ago

    I would give all of my money to my (real) family then kill myself.

    Not because I dislike Taylor Swift, she just has the complete opposite life I want. I do not like attention. I am not an extrovert. I despise people.

    This is actually kind of a nightmare to think about lol.

    • FenrirIII
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      2710 months ago

      If you woke up as her, with all her wealth, you could disappear. Change your hair, gain some weight, no makeup, and tour around Europe

    • @Squirrel@thelemmy.club
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      1710 months ago

      With her money, you can do whatever you want. That includes buying an island and employing trigger-happy security to ensure you enjoy your life of solitude.