The Picard Maneuver to hmmm@lemmy.world • 7 months agohmmmlemmy.worldimagemessage-square26fedilinkarrow-up1319arrow-down114
arrow-up1305arrow-down1imagehmmmlemmy.worldThe Picard Maneuver to hmmm@lemmy.world • 7 months agomessage-square26fedilink
minus-square@confusedbytheBasics@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglish42•7 months agoIs this real today or a prediction of the future?
minus-square@garbagebagel@lemmy.worldlinkfedilink78•7 months agoIt’s obviously fake, my Lotus SmartToilet only ever requests a face scan to verify my identity.
minus-squareTragicNotCutelinkfedilinkEnglish68•7 months agoYou gotta enroll in AnusID! The flush times are significantly faster and the probe to verify you only hurts a little.
minus-square@mojofrododojo@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglish27•edit-27 months agoPUCKERPRINT UNRECOGNIZED. SWIPE AGAIN. PUCKER PRINT UNRECOGNIZED. SWIPE AGAIN.
minus-square🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 ℹ️linkfedilinkEnglish5•7 months agoJust like when I go to the local bodega for weed.
minus-square@over_clox@lemmy.worldlinkfedilink5•7 months agoSadly, very relevant… https://www.businessinsider.com/scientists-designed-a-smart-toilet-with-butt-recognition-technology-2020-4
minus-squarelemmynglinkfedilinkEnglish11•7 months agoIf it was really smart it would scan your butthole.
minus-square@Nachorellalink6•7 months agoI remember reading something about Dali I think getting butthole prints of people and discovering that butthole prints are just as identifying as finger prints.
minus-square@7U5K3N@lemmy.dbzer0.comlinkfedilink2•7 months agoHuh… I never thought about it. But that makes a lot of sense.
minus-square@garbagebagel@lemmy.worldlinkfedilink6•edit-27 months agoI thought we were all joking here but what the fuck: Stanford’s new ‘smart toilet’ will check out your anus Full article from Stanford: https://med.stanford.edu/news/all-news/2020/04/smart-toilet-monitors-for-signs-of-disease.html
minus-square@over_clox@lemmy.worldlinkfedilink2•7 months agoDamn, I heard about that a couple years ago and just looked it up again… https://www.businessinsider.com/scientists-designed-a-smart-toilet-with-butt-recognition-technology-2020-4
minus-squareAwkwardLookMonkeyPuppetlinkfedilinkEnglish6•7 months agoPlease scan your genitals and a copy of your government issued identification to verify your identity.
minus-squareYer Malinkfedilink40•7 months agoYou are attempting to verify a fact. Your authorization code is 42069. The future will never ask for your personal information. Enjoy your flush!
Is this real today or a prediction of the future?
It’s obviously fake, my Lotus SmartToilet only ever requests a face scan to verify my identity.
You gotta enroll in AnusID! The flush times are significantly faster and the probe to verify you only hurts a little.
PUCKERPRINT UNRECOGNIZED. SWIPE AGAIN. PUCKER PRINT UNRECOGNIZED. SWIPE AGAIN.
“I just gotta check your asssshole sir”
Just like when I go to the local bodega for weed.
Sadly, very relevant…
https://www.businessinsider.com/scientists-designed-a-smart-toilet-with-butt-recognition-technology-2020-4
Anal print changed from hemorrhoids.
If it was really smart it would scan your butthole.
I remember reading something about Dali I think getting butthole prints of people and discovering that butthole prints are just as identifying as finger prints.
Huh… I never thought about it. But that makes a lot of sense.
I thought we were all joking here but what the fuck: Stanford’s new ‘smart toilet’ will check out your anus
Full article from Stanford: https://med.stanford.edu/news/all-news/2020/04/smart-toilet-monitors-for-signs-of-disease.html
Damn, I heard about that a couple years ago and just looked it up again…
https://www.businessinsider.com/scientists-designed-a-smart-toilet-with-butt-recognition-technology-2020-4
Please scan your genitals and a copy of your government issued identification to verify your identity.
You are attempting to verify a fact. Your authorization code is 42069. The future will never ask for your personal information.
Enjoy your flush!
VerificationCan.jpg