If only there was someone who could trace those dicks

Please, I’d give anything for it to be the last days of these people.

If you’re making this arduous journey, I strongly recommend stopping by the Hi-way Dairy Bar in Candor on 96B. Grab a Berry Twist, you won’t be disappointed.

So he had a fall and mild pneumonia? Those things aren’t scary at all in the broad scheme of things? So they hid it for nearly a month? Don’t buy it at all.

Chlorophyll? More like Bore-o-phyll!

I’d also love:

• somewhere healthy and fast to eat at night, like a rice bowl drive thru
• to be able to fly on a plane with no children
• to be able to enjoy a draft beer while I grocery shop

I had this issue, it was super annoying. I uninstalled and reinstalled with the latest update and everything worked great again and has been doing so for well over a year. I went down that rabbit hole of trying to update the spoofing settings per fuckyouspez threads and none of those recommendations ever worked for me. Hope this helps!

Flesh-eating Screwworm is my new metal band name, I called it first.

Sorry, couldn’t resist lul

Sick burninate.

Burninate him coyote

Gonna take it in a slightly different direction and pivot the question to music. And in that case, Red Hot Chili Peppers, it’s time to stop. I get it, it was cool and unique. But now, it all sounds the same, and you headline every festival ever and I can’t enjoy the same 5 songs being crammed down my throat for the next 5 decades to come still. Please stop. I know you “can’t stop”, but please, please, stop.

Fuck /u/spez

Taco Bell takes issue with like half of these.

American History X. Curb stomping was a lot for 13 year old me to process.

Given the lawsuit orange fuckface filed last week, I expected to see the day’s biggest news that Bondi informed cheeto dick he was in the files literally anywhere on foxnews, but it was all Obama treason this, Hillary emails that. Weird to think Murdoch wants to use one media arm to fight aussie dirt dingle, but not them all.

Since there’s no pizza morals in this thread, I once made a ‘Hawaiian’ pie at home where I swapped out the pineapple for kiwi. Fun fact: I’m going to hell.

I had a professor in college who would do 10 question pop quizzes from time to time. He would always have the answer key stapled to the front of the envelope as he passed them out. I have good spatial recognition and would always crack a joke to him when he got to me just so he’d pause for a second and I could memorize the pattern real quick. I’d fill out the answers in under 30 seconds and just pretend I took it.

“The haircut does not exist!”

Right now, the ticket I think has the best chance of winning is Buttigieg/AOC. I think the DNC knows they need to go younger and have someone who can stand up to a bully in an eloquent and calm manner that will win over reasonable people. And I think AOC probably knows that the only way the DNC is letting a democratic socialist on the ticket is if they fall in line a bit and not come off as a firebrand who has to fix everything with drastic change and would be willing to go incrementally in the left direction. The DNC would be wise to energize the Bernie youth vote they abandoned last election cycle, but they definitely won’t give her the keys or their blessing alone which blows. This ticket gives you appeal to the youth, to the rational elder folks like even my 70 year old lifetime republican father who hates trump, the gay community, city folk, country folk, and of course veterans too. Pretty solid combo if you ask me.