Excellent answer.
And I really want to emphasize Location matters.
At a Chucky Cheese or a McDonald’s, I would be pleasantly surprised if you offered drinks. And any adults that dare can rummage through the leftovers from the kids if they are desperate or masochists. But, if we’re at a regular restaurant, then this is clearly not about the kids, this is an adult gathering with the kids as an excuse. There better be at least some kind of appetizers or light snacks. And they should have communicated that clearly. The amount I expect to be fed is directly proportional to how much I had to dress up. If I can roll up in my PJs, shove my child out the car door, and drive away, then I expect nothing from you. Sweatpants and whatever shirt I pulled off of the top of the pile of clean laundry? Then I expect a place to sit and some water. If I had to put on my good sweats and find a shirt without holes or stains, then we are entering charcuterie territory. But, if I need to put on a jacket and tie, then you can bet that I expect appetizers, a steak (or steak equivalent), and liquor or dessert.