Does this qualify?

My sister once fell up the stairs.

There was that time I tried to charge a battery but inserted it backwards by mistake, and instead discharged the battery charger.

I’m surviving, and definetly not the fittest.

Some things were not meant to be blended

As an Australian I like to think our wildlife is a crime against nature.

I get asked to relatively often at dayjob, but I keep telling them that we can’t do that…

I use the force to open automatic doors