Jesus as a bumbling type of guy.

Raises Lazarus from the dead. He comes back as a zombie.

Walks on water. He’s using the floaty balloons you put on kids’ arms.

Water to wine. Accidentally lite beer.

I think I had one other one, back when I came up with this idea when I was a lot younger. Or, maybe I said the disciples kept him around for the water-to-wine trick and didn’t really like him. Whatever.