I think the best way of thinking about it is that it’s neither. Vaguely speaking, “quantum stuff” can be described very well by math, and this math has some elements of “waveness” (think wave equations, interference) and “particleness” (think ladder operators or maybe position eigenstates). But that doesn’t mean it’s one, the other, or even both — it’s described by some math, and that math is agnostic as to what you call it.

In our macroscopic experience it’s easy to divide the world into these two convenient buckets, but the reality is different.

Personally I think this weirdness is exploited by popsci to get more clicks, but maybe that’s just my jaded opinion after years of grad school…