im so proud of you for this one, at least I know you’re not in deep enough that you repeat the “LG and Hexbear are all chinese bots!?!?” cliche.
Still it hurts, can’t you stroke our egos more like normal liberals do by pretending we’re important enough for China to pay attention to us like that 
in a shocking turn of events, the service workers of florida have taken control of the national guard depots and established a people’s state. they have seized all private industry and are engaged in a defensive war against the US military. they call it “orange terror”
FBI cannot confirm whether they meant the U.S. state of Georgia’s southern neighbor or the sovereign one’s southern neighbor in an embarrassing turn of events
“in a bout of confusion, the US has invaded Armenia”
Fortunately for everyone, since Armenia is part of the communist superstate (as the Soviet Union), the U.S. accidentally sent in tankies instead of tanks in a second communication error.