• @TexasDrunk@lemmy.world
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    285 months ago

    I want to break it up in a different way.

    I need a pediatrician to see my son. Unvaccinated his pediatrician. Just kicked him out.

    • OfCourseNot
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      65 months ago

      And how about a haiku?

      Need pediatrician My son unvaccinated Just kicked him out

      • @Wilzax@lemmy.world
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        25 months ago

        That’s not a haiku, it needs to be 5, 7, 5 syllables not 6, 7, 4.

        The separation of lines matters, it’s not just 17 syllables.

        • OfCourseNot
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          45 months ago

          Ha! You caught me! Well spotted!

          But now seriously, I’ll try to address your misconceptions:

          That’s not a haiku

          It is.

          it needs to be 5, 7, 5

          Not really. That’s like the definition for kids in school, simple but not 100% accurate. There’s plenty of haiku with different metrics, even single syllable lines.

          not 6, 7, 4

          I count 5-7-4.

          The separation of lines matter

          Iirc in Japanese haiku are written in one line.

          You are kind of right tho. I think it sounds better like ‘He just kicked him out’ but I was trying to making it just taking out words from the original post.

          • @Wilzax@lemmy.world
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            25 months ago

            “Pediatrician” is 5 syllables on its own, so “need pediatrician” is 6.

            Japanese haiku rules who? If it’s English and I can’t sing it to the Jacksfilms Haiku tune, I’m not calling it a haiku

            • OfCourseNot
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              24 months ago

              You are right on the counting. Thanks for the correction! I must’ve read ‘-dia-’ as a diphthong, I don’t think I’ve ever said ‘pediatrician’ out loud until now. Still a haiku anyways.

              And that tune, almost none of the haiku fit the melody! For singing you have to take into account the accents and on beats. Don’t get me wrong I had a good chuckle and may or might not start doing it myself but as a rule of thumb to recognize (or gatekeep) haiku is not the best.

              Reading one-line haiku