

Yeah you got the crux of the problem here! Let‘s correct people that are saying the same with a bit of arrogance to have a dopamine kick and then let’s make a fight about this so we are pushing the other person away
God why everything has to be so divisive these days?!
My dear, I am sorry to hear you are trough a rough patch.
I think that for running, you need to have your legs, feet and muscles working. If they don’t, you need to go to a doctor before enrolling in a marathon. So that would be my path.
You mentioned you are not easily replaceable at work, that causes stress but also work safety. So on that front you have a bit of calm.
You may use the money you earn from there and go see a therapist. Make sure to address your anxiety. Take the time it takes, Rome wasn’t built in a day and, again, you need to be fit before “running“.
If family creates you troubles maybe you need indeed to move out (when you feel ready) because that environment may slow your recovery down. Maybe find some flatmates… and when you see the apartment also try to figure out if they seem mentally healthy (sadly people with trauma are attracted by other people with trauma).
Alternatively you may look into college but, indeed, working full time and studying requires you to be well in shape.
I wish you all the best and, at the end of the day, life is an adventure… you never know when everything starts to turn for the best.
Good luck and an hug