“My god is the god of love and compassion, and if you don’t believe in him, fuck you, I hope he kills you before I do.”

It’s alright, just tell them you have bone spurs.

Or a jar…

My wife would beat me to the curb, shouting “ice cream man!” as she ran.

My mother in law played me a clip the other night and I didn’t even recognize his voice. When did he start sounding like a 2 pack a day smoker?

Rocksmith is what got me back into playing bass regularly again and gave me a way to actually perform when I was no longer in a band. Fired it up, loaded up twitch, and took requests all night. I even got a second cam rigged to the neck of my bass. 2014 was an instant buy and had CDLC so damn quick. I praised it up and down for years. By comparison, plus is performatively better, but it’s also subscription based trash. No CDLC, not getting my money. Didn’t even let you carry over already purchased songs, which they did between original Rocksmith and 2014.

Also there’s a mod set for 2014 now that includes a fix for the sample rate problem that ubisoft told us was impossible to do. It let’s you specify a sample rate so that you can use Bluetooth headphones or other devices that aren’t locked to 48khz, like Bluetooth headphones. Used to have to route it through voicemeeter and deal with a pretty significant delay.

Meanwhile, me walking into that same exact house or neighborhood that’s used in every indie game…

Fine…

S!xTe3N!

First day of my honeymoon, wife and I are sitting down with a drink, my old boss called me and asked real nasty, “I just wanted to know if you were planning on coming in today.”

Uh…no?

Why not?

The ship I’m on is literally leaving port right now. I’m about to not even be in the country. I’m on my honeymoon?

So there’s no possible way for you to come in today?

Not unless you send a helicopter and come here on it to explain to my very angry wife why I’m not going to be here on our HONEYMOON…

Well I have you down as working here today. In the future, you’re supposed to inform us 2 weeks in advance before using your vacation time. You can’t just decide to not come in.

We discussed this in person 6 months ago. I gave you the required form myself at that time. You signed it and gave me a copy, which is sitting on my desk at home. I’ll see you in two weeks.

Alright and when you get back we can have a meeting about properly notifying supervisors when you intend to take long periods of time off…

God, what a miserable asshole she was.

Now there’s a video I wish I could unsee decades later.

I think it was RealPlayer for me. I remember finding different sites and praying the connection was alright. That they were at least close enough in the world that you didn’t see that awful word, “Buffering…” Then I learned how to rip the whole rt file. Pretty sure I still have Trigun in rt actually…

Then once Winamp had video streaming, I remember surfing through crap on there all the time. Sooooo many weird foreign movies and anime…

It’s entirely possible for there to be no good guys in a war. This is just one piece of shit despot attacking another. Cheer for neither, pray for us all.

When my wife and I went on our honeymoon, we spent a night at sea in what’s supposed to be one of the darkest places in the Carribean on the same night there was a shuttle launch. I was so supremely excited to see the true sky. Literally a once in a lifetime experience.

We got hit with a storm. The launch was scrubbed. We spent the night restricted below deck, trying to navigate hallways that almost felt like you could walk on the walls. It was an amazing trip, but I’m still bummed about that night.

Suddenly, Inigo Montoya rushes in and stabs you for killing his father.

EA just doing what it’s always done… Got it.

That’s always been their practice, use up a team until they don’t think they’ll get anything more from them, then shutter them. You don’t go to work for EA for the job security. You work for them because you need a stepping stone…

…Or they bought your studio.

We don’t. Thanks Nixon. Thanks Ehrlichman. Thanks Kaiser. And thanks Hilary too. Even Obama was helpful to the scheme.

Said it before, but I don’t believe for a second this wasn’t discussed during his private, illegal meeting with Netanyahu.

Transitional housing for abused women and children would be the ultimate slap in the face.

Sadly, I had quite a few friends fall for it when Dubya did this. Surely we’ll take care of them when they come back this time…

Not true! The uber rich win…