There’s two completely separate situations happening here.

1. Your relationship with your boyfriend is unfulfilling. You can choose to either try to fix it or end it.

2. You caught feelings for a stranger. Continuing to give time to this person while in a relationship would be inappropriate and wrong by most standards, regardless of how bad or unfulfilling the relationship is.

Fuck her then. I’ve been no-contact with my family for nearly 20 years and have zero regrets.

Your girlfriend wants to do something with her life, and she wants a partner with the same drive. You’re comfortable where you’re at. This sounds like an incompatible arrangement to me, but no assholes here.

That’s not how the average was calculated, see the article I linked. And people can absolutely have a fun time without getting on an airplane. A weekend road trip or camping trip, visiting a zoo, hopping on a train - plenty of fun and affordable options that cover most of the US without flying or dropping two stacks and threatening yourself with homelessness just to have an experience that can wait until you’re more established.

Hell, my favorite vaca was completely free - I strapped a tent (free from Buy Nothing) to my bicycle (same) and rode a trail to a river front campsite that was also free (thanks, boy scouts) and sat by the water relaxing for a few nights. All I had to buy was food.

I did some more digging. 52% of Americans have flown in the past year, including 60% of 18-24 year olds. 70-75% of those flights were for leisure travel. (https://www.airlines.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/03/A4A-Air-Travel-Survey-Key-Findings-18Mar2025.pdf) So I’m still confused - I hear all the time from young people that they can’t afford necessities, that they’re one paycheck away from being homeless, that they’ll never own a home - but they’re able to drop an average of $2k/year on vacations? (https://www.chime.com/blog/average-cost-of-a-vacation/) Make it make sense. Seven years of vacations would be the a down-payment on the median home price. I didn’t take a vacation until my mid 30s because I was trying to ensure that my money went to life stability, so it’s just kind of a head scratcher to me that people are so loose with their money while knowing that it could very easily make them homeless.

I’m kind of blown away that 88% of Americans have flown on an airplane. If everyone is so broke, how are they affording to fly? And people just don’t care about the environmental impact? I’ve never flown, and I can’t imagine I ever will.

Yeah 100%. I’ve been having more of the latter since getting sober - I think it’s just mental fatigue.

Automation is kind of the key point here

In some areas you are legally responsible for your parents if they become unable to take care of themselves. Not saying that makes it OK, but it can certainly be seen as an societal expectation.

It doesn’t make sense that 1080p looks horrible at such a large size when I’m used to 4k?

I’ve definitely found it to be helpful, but my therapist has a lot of experience with trans people and GNC people. Tread carefully if your therapist isn’t as open minded.

Good call out! I’ve been exploring genderfluidity with my therapist but haven’t solidified any identity change at this point.

Not exactly, but often times I feel very guided in my actions, and things always seem to work out when I lean into it, and conversely go bad when I stray from it. Whether that’s wisdom from past lives, genetic coding, ancestors looking down on me, angels, God, aliens, or just powers of subconscious observation - I couldn’t even begin to guess.

For example, I always drive the same route home from work, but once felt an overwhelming desire to take a different way. I found out later that there was an accident on my usual route. Coincidences like that seem to happen a lot.

I know that’s only loosely tied to what you were getting at but thought it was interesting enough to share.

My gender and pronouns are evolving at this point. He/they is fine but I’ve been playing around with detransition, so some days I prefer she. I won’t take offense at whatever way you refer to me.

Absolutely. As a toddler I became adamant that I was previously a boy named something similar to John and lived in the Middle East. I described my life and death in detail. I still remember snippets clearly. I’m not a particularly spiritual person, but have always wondered if it was echos of a past life.

I leaned into this so hard that I refused to wear girl’s clothing, and wanted nothing to do with girly things. I think my parents must have figured I’d grow out of it, but the masculine streak stuck with me.

Labels are for soup cans. Don’t stress too much about it, just go with what feels comfortable to you.

For portable use I love this keyboard: https://a.co/d/a1s6Slt

It’s not the best option if you’re just using it at home, though.

Serial Experiments Lain. I managed to acquire a bootleg Japanese VHS of the show (sans subtitles) in '99 or '00 and fell in love. I bought the English dub as soon as I could find it. I was totally obsessed, even going as far as carrying a messenger bag like Lain had, and making a custom Windows XP theme based on Navi. I even bought a Palm Pocket to mimic the smartphones shown in the show.

Lain shaped my passion for IT, and I feel it changed my life in profound ways.

I’m confused by the sudden popularity. It went under the radar for so long. Now all of the merch goes for insane amounts of money.

This was a really interesting read. I’d love to see a follow-up with autistic individuals to determine if their synchronization matches neurotypical people, and if there’s a difference when they speak with another autistic person.

Hell yeah salmon. It’s expensive in my area but I try to eat it once a week, usually just pan fried and served on a salad. I find that it puts me in a great mood and gives me a lot of energy.