Enron is a pretty good one too

My favorite conspiracy theory is that the NBA draft lottery is rigged. People always say “oh no it couldn’t possibly be rigged because it’s overseen by the accounting firm Ernst & Young”. It used to be overseen by the accounting firm Arthur Andersen until they got busted aiding and abetting the Enron scam.

I think Jim Morrison re-emerged as Val Kilmer.

False. Hawaii wasn’t a state in 1941 and Pearl Harbor wasn’t an invasion anyway. Wake Island would be a better example since it was actually invaded, but it was also a claimed territory and not a state. Assassinations are not “invasions”.

I’m a school bus driver and a former programmer. The elementary kids on my bus like to say “what is six plus seven? Six-seven!” and I say “sure, in Visual Basic”. They don’t get it, naturally enough.

My tenth grade nephew said something about how it started because NBA player Lonzo Ball is 6’7" and was described as “six seven” during a broadcast.

stray carts

This would be a good name for a rockabilly remix band.

some people also have larger-than-average holes

Like sleeve of wizard.

“Oh wait. You put a large cart in the small cart section.”

It’s not really a crisis – eventually he can go back to using regular toilet paper.

“Reagan proved that deficits don’t matter.” - fiscal conservative Dick Cheney

Also killed his own dog – which is apparently a popular fascist activity.

About that: my skoolie only has a single bed. You could have the hammock, I suppose.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gung_ho

The wikipedia article doesn’t mention the “pull together” (as in rope pulling) interpretation. That was from a book about Mao that I read a long time ago, I can’t remember what it was. The book had a bit about Evans Carlson traveling with Mao’s army and meeting him. I am certainly not a Chinese speaker so I’m happy to have my inaccuracies corrected.

I dated a girl whose dad owned an antiques store. Watching Antiques Roadshow with her was a fucking trip. She knew what everything was and almost exactly what they would be valued at.

The only downside to dating her was that she would do things like hanging up an authentic “Ein Reich, Ein Volk, Ein Fuhrer” poster from the 1930s over her mantel. It was hard to convince her that people wouldn’t really appreciate the historicity of such artifacts.

I never knew one school bus from another, they were all just big yellow boxes. Then I started looking to buy a used one and somehow I can now tell make, model and year of every single one I see. I know what engines and transmissions they all have. I can even tell my district’s buses apart from the neighboring district’s buses although they’re exactly the same buses, even if I can’t see the lettering or numbers on the sides. And yet somehow I’m still single!

sounds like a communist slogan

I’ve always been amused by the fact that “gung ho” (which in Mandarin means “pull together”, as in pulling on a rope in unison) started out as a slogan of the Chinese Communist Party under Mao and then migrated to the US during WWII because of an openly-communist Marine. Its real meaning is more like “be a team player” but it was somehow transformed into “eagerly shoot brown people”.

Also, the Marines’ “ooh rah” chant sounds exactly like the Soviet Red Army’s chant. More weird shit.

Lol we (the US) haven’t had “foreign invaders” since the War of 1812.

Same reason people think “Corinthian leather” is fancy – when there’s actually no such thing as Corinthian leather.

I’m squishing your head!

Overrated. ON ERROR RESUME was much more fun.