Hello you awesome people,
Friends are having a boy and everyone they know wants to push a name on the child. So I decided to be the best friend they could have and to offer only bad, ugly or horrendous names to the lucky parents so they could have a laugh. I already send them some names and dictators, Smeagol, Steve and Juan-Esteban.
So please, people or Lemmy, give me the worst names you could give a child, so that I can help them as a good friend!
Ps: don’t worry, I’ve already planned some meals to drop off when the gremlin will be there to feed the parents. And some take-out vouchers so they won’t get food poisoning
X Æ A-12
The only way to escape a name like that is to take a phallic rocket to mars and start a new colony
The only winner here is his sister who’s name was not as publicized. Exa Dark Siderael
Sounds like a hidden boss in a final fantasy game
Actually so many boss fights in life
How do you even pronunce that?
No joke, it’s pronounced Kyle. It’s the Greek letter chi, the dipthong æ which is called an æsc (pronounced ash) that makes a sound similar to the “a” in “cat” but shorter, and A-12 stands for “alphabet 12” or the 12th letter of the alphabet which is L. So chi-æ-l or kinda like a two syllable “Kyle”
Wow, I see it now. That is beyond retarded. Jesus Christ
Pretty fuckin cringe that you’re still calling stuff retarded lmfao 1998 called they want their insults back
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Can we not throw slurs around?
Dixon.
It’s only pronounced that way because he’s a dick’s son.
That was the joke, but I trust it’s much improved by the explication.
Is (the name at issue) this some unicode shit or sumfing?
It’s what a manchild thinks is sci-fi.
Shi-thead
Honestly such a classic https://youtu.be/r_Ua8iOR0g8?si=D-UWy03OoBxFszEy
Man those were the golden days of yt
I may have seen that one too, but I was thinking about this one, lol
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Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
https://piped.video/r_Ua8iOR0g8?si=D-UWy03OoBxFszEy
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.
It’s pronounced kyle
I read they pronounce it Xavier
For real?
Edit: doesnt he have a Xavier already?
Edit: duplicative
Does he care about any of his kids enough to know if there’s already a Xavier?
Xavier v2.0
Bob, short for Bobert. So that every time he has to say his full name to anyone on the phone or fill out forms somewhere, he has to repeatedly explain that, no, it’s not Robert, it’s Bobert.
Best one so far
Extra points if you tell him it’s because of Lauren Boebert, the classiest woman to walk this earth.
/s
Ted, get off of Lemmy.
You monster.
Ngl i have considered calling every Rob/Bob i know Bobert, but i like this idea better
I knew someone who did that to me in high school. I hated him, for many reasons, mind, but that was one. I hated him enough to be almost glad his wife died. Not that I am, and nothing against her, just… fuck him.
I’ve been called Bert by one guy, and sometimes I wonder if I should have run with that. Another guy would call me Rootbeer. I was totally fine with that, as you can see.
Robert with a B
Tombert.
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Robert’); DROP TABLE Students;–
Little Bobby Tables as we call him.
Spez.
Now that would just be cruel.
Sue.
I dont know about that.
See, this world is rough, and if a man’s gonna make it, he’s gotta be tough. If a father knew he wouldn’t be there to help his son along he could, hypothetically, give him that name, say goodbye, and know his son would have to get tough or die.
That very name would then help to make him strong.
Right but everyone would be like “haha sue like the song” and he’d get so annoyed
I bet Sue’d be able to put up one hell of a fight.
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He’d hunt you down and beat the snot out of you!
More like “Suetable”
Pubert
Only if Pube is considered as it’s diminutive!
Her comes lil Pubey!
Fucking Pubert!
Boink! Boink! Boink,! X2$&#@!?!
X Æ A-12
“Hello 911? I’ve just witnessed a murder.”
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Adolf
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A lot of names are cool but then get ruined with shit like that. I always thought Isis was a beautiful name. But terrorism ruined it.
My neighbor named her dog Isis like the Greek God. It was not timely lol
Isis is Egyptian!
And Goddess! (not a God.)
Shows how much I listened to her about it. Whoops!
Also an awesome post metal band Isis. I have a t-shirt of theirs with the lyrics to a song called ‘Dying Light’ which is about death, the afterlife and reincarnation sorta stuff, needless to say I haven’t been able to wear it in many years.
That wouldn’t fly with the city clerk in Belgium. But then again, one can always try!
Should have made a joke with “nein”, but people would be Fuhrerious about it!
I once knew someone who refused to tell anyone the name they chose before the baby was born (absolutely valid choice, IMO). The grandpa-to-be chose to exclusively refer to the fetus as Beelzebub.
That is normal around where I live, because you never know if it will be
alicealive after birth. So I mostly see the name in the birth-card my friends usually sendAlice Afterbirth is a great name for the placenta
Also a good name for an indie prog metal band
Where are you from? Chernobyl?
Switzerland, why?
because you never know if it will be
alicealive after birth.I know the risk exists here as well, but “you never know” sounds like something someone from rural Africa would say, not Switzerland.
Maybe its an old tradition. But I was shocked by how deadly being pregnant and giving birth (to the mother and the child even moreso) is, still to this day. I thought we solved childbirth or something.
Yeah, the female physique hasn’t really adapted to our enormous head size. We solved child mortality more or less, but pregnancy and birth is still quite dangerous.
- Spanko
- Twallypod
- Roooooo
- Meganginipple
- Nipple
- Craig
- Nart
- Puddin
- Sue
- Ticksy
- Ewwgross
I do not have enough up votes for this
'ay nart, wuh yew uh to tday spud
I too have heard the legend of Spanko.
First, anything ending in -ayden. 2-4, I’m just going to list a few real names I’ve heard. Middles included.
Wynter Obsidian
Ocean Zebediah
Buck Shot
Dude, “Buck Shot” is awesome. That kid is pretty much guaranteed to be an astronaut with a name like that.
Or a gay porn actor. No in between options.
Nah, I see cop as an option. More likely than astronaut, actually.
But most of all, I see him becoming a “professional YouTuber” of the “rant from the cab of a pickup truck wearing a baseball cap and wearing oakleys” genre, before going out and attempting to kidnap a politician at gunpoint. It’s one of those nominative determinism things, for sure.
Aaron Mayden?
Mayden America
We were gonna go with Winter Grace. Really-really. There are reasons. But, due to other reasons, kids didn’t happen.
X Æ A-12
Grzegorz Brzęczyszczykiewicz
Grzegorz is a perfectly normal name, and it’s not their fault if they have a difficult surname 😔
It’s probably not even difficult in Poland either
Well, there’s a bit of context behind it:
The name is a meme in Poland and comes from the 1969 adventure-comedy mini-series Jak rozpętałem drugą wojnę światową (How I unleashed World War 2).
In the second episode, the main character is in hiding insideof Nazi Germany after escaping from a Prisoner of War camp. He is eventually arrested for an unrelated reason and this is the fake name he gives to the German bureaucrat using the typewriter. Unsurprisingly, he is baffled by the spelling, especially once he gets it right… since he gets an even more difficult fake birthplace to spell by the MC.
Edit: If you mean Grzegorz, it means George and isn’t too difficult, I suppose.
sounds like it could be a dortmund 2011 player
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Hahaha, thanks.
The post clearly asked for the worst names, not the very best /s
Little Bobby Tables, we call him.
He said worst, not best.
Open a random page in any P. G. Wodehouse novel and you’re good to go! Gussie Fink-Nottle, Bingo Little, Kipper Herring, Stiffy Byng. Or, my personal fave, add in an extra letter like he did for his character Psmith, where, he explains, the “p” is silent, "as in pshrimp.”
Those are awful names for people but fantastic names for bands.
