Honestly, no. Many of worst fears have come true, and both my physical and mental health keep deteriorating year after year, I just got a new chronic disease diagnosis on top of the old ones. I really should have killed myself when I first started considering it and saved myself from this hell, but I thought I’d save my family from suffering through that. But now I just have more people to hurt, and I’m also pulling them into poverty and misery with me either way. If I had died years ago, my family would at least have had all this time to get their lives together afterwards. Now I’m just suffering more and they’re just going to suffer even more as well.

The most frustrating thing is, I’ve made no mistakes and still ended up here. Most of this could have happened to pretty much anyone. I get this is supposed to be wholesome, but I’m just really tired and sinking ever deeper. There’s no happy endings for all of us