Exactly, thank you. I also enjoy Abby Cox’s videos on corsetry and living in period accurate 18th century clothes full time for many years. The “dream team” of Youtube dress historians got together to debunk common corsetry myths on this video which summarizes succinctly how these myths continue to propagate and where they came from. I jumped to a timestamp where they talk about where those images of deformed rib cages come from but the whole video is pretty entertaining
This blog perpetuates a lot of common myths about corsetry and I find that disappointing.
It’s a pretty widespread and common thing that children wear similar clothing to adults, and whatever the adult fashion is, kids often get a miniaturized version of it. The children’s corsets pictured in the ads there don’t minimize the waist or attempt to give them an hourglass, and would have been lightly boned or have no boning at all. If there was boning, it would have been made of flexible material like whale balleen (the material filter feeding whales have instead of teeth, which behaves like a soft thermoplastic) or ribbons, cording or even paper. These are not materials that can damage a body unless maybe you stab yourself with them or light them on fire.
Corsets were used to provide a smoothing layer under clothes, to give some structure and yes the fashionable silhouette. However, it was commonly understood that a body in clothing was very different from a body out of it. There was more body privacy and control over how your body was perceived. The combination of corsets, stays, “bodies” and strategic use of padding meant anyone could be the fashionable silhouette, no matter your natural body type. Far more women achieved those “tiny waists” by wearing bum pads, hip rolls, underskirts and crinolines, mutton sleeves and frilly blouses than tight lacing. It was all smoke and mirrors.
Now with skin tight knits and thin leggings and exposed skin the only way to have a fashionable silhouette is for your body to actually look like that, which fuels the fitness and weight loss industry. I find it interesting that these articles always talk about “unrealistic body standards” when ironically body standards have only gotten more aggressively unrealistic and unreasonable, not less.
Modern corsets have little to no resemblance to their historical counterparts, which were lightweight, flexible, practical support garments that provided some structure to the clothing of the time and bust support for women. Extreme outliers existed but were far from the norm. A lot of the period writing about the harm corsets were doing was written by men bloviating about how stupid they thought women were to wear the clothing they preferred, a time honored tradition which continues to this day.
There is nothing controversial here, children wore underwear too.
Excellent by American standards for most of Boston and Greater Boston, which is to say mediocre by European standards. It’s entirely possible to be independently mobile and car free there. Most places are walkable and there are pleasant old buildings and green spaces or plazas or spots overlooking water to stumble upon. It’s a lovely city.
We hosted a Friendsgiving today, there were 19 of us with all sorts of stories. Family friends who just didn’t feel like cooking. Friends whose family has passed, another friend with a restraining order against hers. Friends who had moved far from their families and another who just does Thanksgiving with their family on the weekend instead. Everyone came and got stuffed full of turkey and mashed potatoes. I love that our home can be a place of togetherness and community for the people in our lives.
Ace and demi men are out there, but I won’t pretend they are easy to find. I’m demi and looking for someone else on the ace spectrum pretty much eliminated the idea of meeting someone out in the world and locked me in to finding someone online. Back when OKCupid was data driven it was the best way to find other aces and demis but I don’t know the current state of it. There’s not much visibility for aces so a lot of people don’t know to identify themselves as such.
I dated a variety of people but always came back to people who were ace/demi having the most potential for long term companionship. It just simplified everything, removed the tension, and potential for hurt feelings. Allosexuals might think they can manage a situation like you’re describing but in the long term might end up feeling frustrated and sad about not being desired. It was always worth the search when I did find other aces.
Chores, organizing, cleaning. I spent so much time working on home projects this summer and when I look around it feels like I lost time. Somehow I’ve been working consistently without getting a foothold or making progress. Still laundry in the dryer and a mess everywhere.
My mother joined me for a one-shot once and this is basically the character we rolled up for her. She was Nana Ylva, a human barbarian. Her thing was generally trying to solve things non-violently (often using her “Mom Voice” aka intimidation) but if she saw her “cubs” under attack she would rage. She had the chef feat that gave food with temp hp boosts. It was a fun little game and my mom still talks about it sometimes.
I wear Gwamm on my main but I have a glowy Sylvari with radiant pieces who has “Super Shiny”.
I guess everyone has their own way of boiling an egg!
I’ve been very happy with the steamed egg method. I put a steamer basket in a pot with just enough water that it touches the bottom of the basket, bring it to boil and then put as many eggs as I want in to the basket using a pair of tongs with silicone grippies. I set a timer for 11min, put it on medium heat, cover the pot and set up an ice bath. After 11min the eggs go in the ice bath for a minute or two and I crack them and roll them on a cutting board to loosen the shells. They come out exactly how I like them with a golden yolk with a soft orange center and the shells are super easy to peel as long as I get my thumb under the membrane.
I’ve made them this way with fresh eggs, week old eggs, month old eggs, home chicken eggs, storebought eggs, and never had issues with peeling.
It’s because he’s actually smiling
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Genuinely surprised it’s real https://www.truthorfiction.com/peyo-horse-hospital/
I think there’s a bias when we’re looking back at our own experiences and memories because we see how simple they were compared to our older selves. I know before I had a kid I had a very dim view of their mental capabilities before age 4, and thought people were bragging and exaggerating what they could do at that age. However, now I’ve got my own who says things almost every day that surprise me, and I’m so impressed with what he can accomplish. I don’t think we give them enough credit, or enough chances to really show us what they are capable of.
If you think of being self aware and realizing you’re an individual and exist it might even start before day 1. If it’s about the continuity of self, I’ve only been the person I am right now for a few years at this point. I think if you’re doing it right we are constantly growing, changing and evolving, and just because a previous version of ourselves wasn’t as developed as the current one, doesn’t mean it wasn’t sapient and full of the idiosyncrasies that make us unique and interesting.
It’s impressively soon IMO. Our kid was showing his personality and likes and preferences around 4 months. We taught him hand signs/baby sign language and he really caught on to it at about 8 months. He made up his own signs and signals for things we didn’t give him words for and was communicating pretty intricate concepts clearly with us by the time he was 1.
I don’t know, what do you want to call consciousness? Personally I don’t think just because I have no memory of my first couple of years doesn’t mean I wasn’t conscious. I know I was concious a couple years ago and I can’t remember shit from then. I don’t think it’s as clear as a switch on/off and would say it’s more like a gradient of building complexity.
It really depends on what. I can’t tell my 3 year old to “stop crying”, that would be worse than useless. I can tell him he needs to sit on his bed until he’s calm. I can tell him not to hit me, but I need consequences and consistency for months until it finally works and he restrains himself. We have a foundation of trust and a general understanding that there are dangers out in the world, so if we tell him to stop and get away from a hazard he listens because he trusts our judgement, but that only works for me and my partner.
So can you just tell a toddler to do something and they do it? Yes, some people, sometimes, for some things.
Maybe.
I think this post should be home that you own. I’m going to say something controversial in that, in the US, I actually think houses should be expensive. I think a single family dwelling >1500sqft on a half acre or more of land is a luxury, and most people don’t need to have that much land and space all to themselves. The problem is that that’s ALL that’s available for most regions in the US. The US is suffering from foolish post-war suburban centric zoning codes that prohibit building medium density housing (“the missing middle”). We need to change zoning codes across the country to encourage building up “gentle density” and mixed use areas, even in rural regions, because they use land and infrastructure much more effectively and efficiently. They raise more revenue for towns while bringing down home prices. If everyone had the option to buy a place of their own <1000sqft with a small land footprint, I don’t think there would be as much dissatisfaction with not being able to afford a “house”.
It’s a tactic used by people who don’t have the confidence, ability, or power in a relationship to communicate directly. It’s usually used to be spiteful, take revenge, or express displeasure, thinly veiled behind some plausible deniability. A passive aggressive action can be something like:
A person preparing food for someone they feel is unappreciative might deliberately over-salt or overcook it to spoil that person’s enjoyment of it
A person who doesn’t like things being left on the floor might purposely step on or trip over/kick something they see there, damaging or dirtying it
A person resenting being asked to do a task might make very little effort, do it wrong, or make the situation worse than it was to avoid being asked in the future
It’s essentially a way to be hostile and unpleasant to people you socialize with, but if called on their actions, the person being passive aggressive can make excuses or deflect blame. It’s not a healthy dynamic and leads to frustration and erosion of trust on all sides. It perpetuates and exacerbates problems rather than resolving them.
Yes, believing that they will be discriminated against for things that they like and face negative consequences for expressing who they are will discourage many people from doing things, not just girls.
There are plenty of girls who fit into a more masculine standard of behavior and will integrate better into male dominated spaces. However, some girls will want to enjoy feminine coded things without judgement in those spaces and that is valid too.
Meal prep and have easy to heat up meals ready to go for the first two weeks. Cooking becomes harder than you would ever believe once kiddo arrives.
Get baby bottles with limited feed nipples and at least two varieties of formula ready. Milk doesn’t always come in on time or in the quantities that baby needs. Babies can also have digestive issues or taste preferences so having a backup option is clutch.
Get something that will let you wear the baby hands free. Some babies will wake like clockwork within minutes of being put down and sometimes the only way you can get something done is with the baby on your chest.
Something I didn’t know about was that young babies under 3 months go a little crazy with their limbs when they sleep and need to be swaddled so they don’t flail around. They’re used to being in a confined space so being wrapped up in a baby blanket is very comforting. Make sure you have at least 3 to rotate out when they get dirty. They come in a few varieties so see which might work for you.
Babies can come early, like three weeks early, so get everything ready like diapers and wipes well before the due date. Assume you have less time than you think so you’re not caught off guard.
Talk to family or friends and find out who would be able to help with chores, food or watching the baby periodically for the first few months
There’s a ton of second hand, barely used or basically brand new baby stuff out there in basically any population center. Definitely check out second hand stuff for anything that you are thinking of spending more than pocket change on
Sleep is precious, enjoy it while you can